


my past is like the weather

by deargalileo



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Amnesia, Angst, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, Florists, For the most part, Lost Taako, M/M, Memory Loss, Missing Persons, Past Abuse, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Team as Family, Trains, Vague concept of time passing, most characters are in here but aren't tagged due to overtagging
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2019-10-25 21:43:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 31,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17733218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deargalileo/pseuds/deargalileo
Summary: "my past is like the weather- it will come, and it will go"losing your memory and suddenly gaining it back isn't an easy thing to do. sometimes you lose it over, and over again. sometimes you get lost yourself. this is the story of taako, who lost himself, and the family that found him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> check out the playlist i made for this story! i listened to it as i wrote the whole thing, and im actually pretty proud of it haha  
> https://open.spotify.com/user/emily.mcintyre14/playlist/3jP3QVbeyZYgUq8S6alCA5?si=2rm470TjQvOPUx8_dnjgAg

Memories were a tricky thing- Taako tried his hardest to cling to his mind, especially after everything that had happened with the Voidfish. Remembering Lup may have been one of the most painful things that had ever happened to him physically, and he had a fucking _laundry machine_ dropped on his chest at one point.

He should have known that his brain would fuck up at some point, it only made sense. Just as things were finally going great- Taako and Lucretia could finally be in the same room as each other, exchange a few cordial words with the other. Kravitz and Taako formally adopted Angus, and the three of them lived in a cute little home close to Lup and Barry’s shared home. When he wasn’t working, Kravitz was gardening. Taako spent his days cooking, and teaching magic to Angus. There were also countless meetings about the new school with Ren, but Ren took most of that into her hands.

Sometimes Taako forgot where he was. Sometimes he forgot little things, like whatever he came into the room to do, but sometimes he forgot who Lup was, couldn’t understand why a mirror image was staring him right in the face, but not following his movements, instead worriedly asking him if he was alright. Reflections didn’t do that.

 But it was fine. Incidents like that were far and few in between, and most of the time Kravitz or Lup were there to help him. He was fine, everyone forgot somethings some of the time.

_(Except not everyone woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, not recognizing the man who lay next to him, wondering where Sazed is- oh Gods Sazed is going to kill him-_ )

There were no warning signs. His mind and memories were like the tide, it would come, and it would go. There were good days, and bad days.

There was one instance where he woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare, forehead slick with sweat and panicking. The room he was in was dark, but he didn’t recognize it, where was he- Then a man sat up beside him, obviously startled awake. He repeated Taako’s name a few times, and gently grasped Taako’s hands.

“It’s me, love. It’s Kravitz, your husband. We are in Neverwinter, visiting Magnus. Angus is just down the hall. The Hunger is gone. You are safe. We have been married for three years…” And he went on. Taako breathed heavily as this man, this stranger who was not a stranger spoke of their wedding. When his mind started to come back to him, Taako buried his head into his husband’s chest.

“I’m sorry,” Kravitz was there in an instant, delicately raising Taako’s chin so they could make eye contact.

“Don’t be sorry. I know that you don’t want this, you can’t control this.”

“But it’s happened so often that you know what to do-”

“It has only happened a few times, and I know what to do because I know you, love. We can talk about this in the morning, sleep now.” Taako slipped back into an uneasy and light sleep with Kravitz pressed up against them. In the morning, when Angus woke the two up by crawling into bed with them, Taako had smiled and ruffled the boy’s hair, ignoring the worried look that Kravitz sent his way.

It wasn’t always that dramatic or awful- sometimes Taako forgot the little things. Once he forgot the name of Magnus’ dog, which only slightly broke the fighter’s heart. Taako felt marginally bad, and remembered the name ten minutes later, shouting “ _Johann_!”, nearly falling out of his chair and giving Magnus a heart attack.

Then, there were moments where he would forget Lup. He would be cooking, stirring something in a pot, and feel a bit dazed. When he would look up, there would be someone who looked exactly like him standing in front of him, repeating his name worriedly. Taako nearly dropped the spoon into the pot and stumbled backwards. His back hit the counter behind him, allowing him the perfect space to slide down, confused. Who was this person? Why did his head hurt so badly?

His mirror image knelt next to him, and tried to talk to him, but the whole thing was a bit too trippy for him- maybe he had eaten some bad food and was now quite literally seeing double. Except this double had short hair, and Taako has never cut his hair short-

When it all came back to him, both Lup and Kravitz were bent over him, talking quickly. Taako had managed to convince Krav to keep his little memory loss episodes on the downlow, but now that cover was blown. Lup had hugged him for two minutes straight when Taako tried to apologize for that little episode.

The static never really left Taako. It was like a phantom pain, something that haunted him, something that would haunt him until his last days. And yeah, it was shitty. It was super shitty. But Taako got through it.

* * *

 

“I don’t think you should go-” Kravitz started to say, already making anger flare up in Taako’s bones.

“I’m not some fucking baby, Krav. I’m a grown-ass elf, I can take care of myself.” His response was too snappish, and he knew that, he knew that Kravitz was only looking out for him, but _still._ Kravitz’s face softened.

“I know that love. I just don’t think you should go alone to the school, not right now.” Kravitz cast a look towards the open doorway where a certain little boy detective was most certainly listening in on their conversation. “I would even go with you, if you want.” Taako resisted the urge to groan as Kravitz lowered his voice. “You just had another episode a few nights ago, it could be dangerous sending you out into the world by yourself.”

“Kravitz, love, bone daddy, sweet-bones, I am fine. I can handle a day train ride out, and if you are really that stressed out about it, Ren can meet me at the train station in Neverwinter.” Kravitz opened his mouth to interject but Taako charged on. “It’s my fucking school, what kind of school-person-fuckin’-I-don’t-know-what-they’re-called would I be if I never visited? I’m not some fucking invalid, I just get confused occasionally.”

“Taako, you know it’s more than that-”

“Nu-uh. I’m going, and you can’t stop me.”

“Taako-”

“Nope.”

“Why-”

“I’m only going to be gone for a couple of days, Krav. A week, tops. If you are really that worried about it, you can rip a portal in a few days and come over yourself.”

“See, that would be the perfect plan, just give me some time to ask the Raven Queen if I can take a few days off, and then I can take us both over there to the school and-”

“No!”

“Why not?” Kravitz seemed stressed, and Taako _knew_ that he was trying to be understanding.

“I am capable of going on a fuckin’ week long trip, Krav. I don’t need a babysitter.”

“I- I’m not trying to be a- can’t we even have a discussion about this?”

Taako ignored that, standing up with a flourish. Kravitz watched him with exasperation, making Taako’s heart pang. Taako wasn’t an _idiot_ , he can go on a fucking train without anyone watching him.

“Ango, bubbeleh, come out here,” Taako called out towards the door. A beat passed, then the boy detective poked his head through the door sheepishly. “What did we say about eavesdropping on other conversations?”

“That we should only do it if they have juicy gossip, or I’m on a case,” Angus replied in a dull tone, having heard the speech a million times as he stepped out into the room.

“Exactly, pumpkin. Do you want to help me make some dinner?”

“Taako, we should really talk about this-” Kravitz stood up as well, looking a bit pained. Taako hated fighting with him on stupid things like this which is exactly why Kravitz should just give up. Taako was going on this trip regardless of what his husband said.

“No. I am leaving tomorrow morning. I will call you when I get to the school, and all of that fun stuff.” Angus was shooting calculating glances between the two, probably trying to put together what this fight was about. Kravitz and Taako had both been trying to keep Taako’s memory blips away from Angus, but the little nerd probably had it all figured out.

Kravitz opened his mouth to counter Taako, but Taako grabbed Angus’ hand, pulling him out of the room and into the kitchen, effectively ending the conversation.

So, he forgot some shit occasionally- everyone did. You can’t blame him after everything that happened. It was probably the Voidfish’s fault, although Magnus might actually cry if Taako vocalized the accusation.

That night, Taako went to bed early and pretended to be asleep when Kravitz came to bed. Kravitz totally knew that he was bluffing and pressed a few soft kisses to Taako’s shoulder.

“I love you,” He whispered between kisses. Taako felt himself melt amid his annoyance. “And I want you to be safe, Taako. I apologize if it seems that I am treating you like a child. I know you are very capable of taking care of yourself.”

Now, this would be the best time to turn around and forgive Kravitz, hell, maybe even throw in an apology of his own. But Taako is nothing if not a petty bitch, so he continued his charade of sleep.

Kravitz pressed one last kiss on the nape of Taako’s neck, mummering something about love, and fell asleep. Taako waited until Kravitz’s breathing evened out before turning and facing his sleeping husband. Gently, he reached out and traced the features of his face, trying to commit it to memory. Krav thankfully slept like the dead (ha) and didn’t respond to Taako’s gentle touches.

Taako loved him, he truly did, and he hated fighting with Kravitz. But he was _so_ fucking tired of him acting like Taako was some fragile baby, like the smallest thing would break him. And it wasn’t just Kravitz- Lup was talking about talking to Merle or Davenport about trying to find a cure. If Merle knew, then he would tell Magnus. Chances were that Barry already knew, Lup told him everything. Then Lucretia would get caught up in the mix, if Magnus knew then he would tell Carey who would tell Killian and the list goes on. Taako loved his family, he really did, but they couldn’t keep a secret for shit.

Tomorrow morning, Taako would leave for the train station. The ride would take a full day, and most of it would be weaving in and out of mountains which meant no service. Taako would call Kravitz and calm his nerves once he got to the school and stay with Ren for a few days. He would be badass, look rad while teaching kids, and everyone would be sad when he went home because, how could they not be? He was _Taako,_ from _TV_! Plus, the chances of him forgetting shit were slim, and they never lasted long. He would have his stone of farspeech with him the whole time if something went wrong, too.

He would be fine.

Early the next morning, Taako woke up well before anyone else, hardly before the sun was up. His head hurt slightly, so he took some medicine that Merle had left for his headaches last time he came to visit. He quietly grabbed the luggage that he had packed the night before, and placed a delicate kiss on his husband’s cheek. Before he headed out, he checked Angus one last time- the boy was still sleeping, his head of curly hair poking out his large duvet. Taako briefly considered leaving a note or something, but that gave him bad vibes, it always did, so Taako made his exit, closing and locking the door behind him.

There was a tight feeling in his chest as he left. Taako knew that Angus would wake up before Kravitz did and crawl into their bed, probably startled by the fact that Taako wasn’t there in his usual spot. Kravitz would realize what had happened the moment he woke up, and would probably call Taako when he did, but if things went according to schedule then Taako would already be on the train.

 But it wasn’t like he was going to be gone for weeks- it was only a few days, and if Kravitz wanted to, he could come and join Taako. But Taako could handle going on a train by himself- he wasn’t some baby.

Gripping his stone tightly in one hand, and his wand in the other, Taako made his way to the train station.

Once there, he checked in.  They took his luggage to put away in the cart, leaving Taako a little time to wander before his train left the station. The station was surprisingly full of people, but Taako simply chalked it up to morning rush. He got himself settled into bench, opting to fiddle with stone and people watch. Everyone who was passing looked boring, like they were off to go do some awful desk job. Taako took mere satisfaction in knowing that his job was done- he had saved the world, and his husband was the fucking grim reaper. Much better than filing fucking papers, _Susan_.

Eventually, the people watching got pretty boring so Taako stood up, looking for a fantasy Starbucks or something.

Before Taako could do anything, he heard the distant faint noise of magic, specifically a spell being thrown, and pounding footsteps.

“Stop him!” Someone knocked into Taako- _hard_ \- and bolted, sending Taako to the ground and the crowd around him to part. He hit his arm in the wrong way, and there was no time for him to pull out his wand. Heavy footsteps pounded past him, and distant Taako could see the robes of law enforcement whirling past him.

His head was _throbbing_ , the once dull pain suddenly sharp, and constant. He grabbed at his head, pressing at his temples, anything to stop the pain. Taako squeezed his eyes shut, the lights and noise were suddenly too much and-

Taako forgot.

When Taako opened his eyes again, the first thing that he noticed was all the people that crowded around him. Except… They weren’t looking at him, they were looking off to the left of him, but from him position on the floor, he couldn’t see anything. As he took quick mental stock, he realized that something was dreadfully wrong.

Taako couldn’t remember anything.

He knew his name, but he didn’t know anything else. Everything else in his mind was empty, all his memories, all of his personal thoughts. He still knew things, he could picture snow on the ground, and trees, but he didn’t have anything personal connected to it. It was like the shelves in his mind were there, but they were only filled with the basics. Amid his panic, someone looked down at him.

“Oh- sorry, sir,” They held out a hand, and Taako looked at them cautiously. It was a woman, dressed in a nice dress. Did Taako know her? Was she a friend? Would she be able to help? “Sir?”

Taako took her hand and let her help him up. The second he was standing upright his head spun, and he felt dizzy. The woman (a halfling, his mind helpfully supplied) frowned at him. “Are you alright?” Ignoring the question at first, Taako patted his pockets, looking for something, anything that could give him a hint as to of who he was. He was wearing fancy clothes, they were clearly well made, but none of that triggered any memories. _Did I like expensive clothes?_ Taako must have, because even his shoes were fancy, with gemstones sprinkled all around.

“Si-” The halfling woman was cut off by the shrill whistle of a train bell. _A train._ Taako had to get on a train! He wasn’t sure why, or which train, but he followed his instinct and strode past the woman, mumbling apologies and excuses. It was clear to him now that he was in a train station, and clearly, he was to get onto a train, but he was not sure why, or where he was going. Thankfully, he was right in front of a slowing train, so he slipped inside when the doors opened, beside the other passengers.

As the door slid shut behind him, Taako turned, staring through the window at the train stations. It would probably have been more efficient to go get help or seek medical assistance. But now he was on some random train, with no memory, and no clue where he was going. He truly did just walk onto the first train that he saw as well, there was nothing indicating that this was the right train other than the fact that he knew that he had to get on a train.

Hopefully he could figure it all out on the ride there, or wherever there was.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Taako sat and waited.
> 
> And waited.
> 
> And waited.

‘ _WELCOME TO EASTBORNE_ ’, the sign read in bright red letters. ‘ _Get into the Eastborne groove_ ’. Taako took an uncertain step off the train, stepping onto the platform and cringed when the sign. They really couldn’t come up with anything better? Taako stood in the middle of the platform, only a few steps out of the train. Other passengers streamed out on either side of him, and he was eventually pushed further into the station. His heart was pounding in his chest now- he really had no idea what he was doing. The train intuition thing was a blessing, but now he was really stranded.

On the train (the ride ended up being two days, most of it weaving in and out of mountains) Taako tried to remember. He looked through what meager belongings that he had (only a wand, a small pouch of gold coins and a stone of farspeech which didn’t work, since they were under a mountain). He didn’t have any money, or any identification. There were a surprising number of rings on his fingers, including one on his ring finger. Taako tried to meditate, only to have his mind filled with this _awful_ static and visions of dark hands grabbing for him at every angle. Taako just stuck to quick naps after that.

Although he was on a train which was something, he _knew_ he had to do, something felt wrong, and more so as the trip moved into the second day. Taako knew he wasn’t supposed to be there, but he also didn’t know where he was supposed to be. And it wasn’t like he could ask the conductor to stop the train so he could get off, they were in the middle of a fucking mountain range!

Most of the trip was spent wandering up and down the aisles, trying to inspect as many faces as he could. Everything in his mind was _gone_. All he knew was that his name was _Taako._ Or at least he hoped it was- that seemed right, but he had no evidence to prove or deny the fact. He turned the name over in his head a few times. _Taako_. Was that a nickname? What was his last name? Where did he get the name? Why was that the only thing that remained with him?

Now, the train had reached its destination, which was Eastborne, apparently. Wherever the fuck that was. Stepping out onto the train, Taako tried to gather his bearings and make a plan. Maybe someone would be here waiting to pick him up- unlikely, but it was something to do. But first- luggage.

Taako had no idea what he had, if he had any luggage, but it was worth a shot. Trying to act casual, he walked over to the carousel and waited, watching others grab their suitcases and bags. No one paid him any mind, and clearly couldn’t see the turmoil that was happening within him. Taako scanned every suitcase that went past, but none of them looked even vaguely familiar. Everything just felt cold, and unfamiliar and- all the suitcases had been picked up. Clearly, he didn’t have anything for him here.

With even less of an idea than before, Taako found a bench and sat down. He could wait here for a little bit and see if anyone came looking for him. Maybe seeing a familiar face would help kick his memory back, and this whole ordeal would be over. So Taako sat and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Taako sat there, with what meager hope he had before diminishing with every minute that passed. Eventually a station worker told him that the train station was closing soon, which roughly translated to _get the fuck out_. Making sure to huff, and act like he was extremely offended, Taako left, leaving less than subtle threats that his lawyer would be hearing about this. Now he could only hope that he actually _did_ have a lawyer, so there could be worth behind his threats.

When Taako stepped out of the train station, he was almost instantly overwhelmed with the feeling of being _lost_. It was dark outside, with only sparsely placed street-lanterns casting a dim light over the road before him. All he had with him was a wand, and a stone of farspeech-

 _The stone of farspeech._ Hands shaking, Taako grappled for his pocket, trying to get the stone out as quickly as he could. It was cold in his hands but Taako smiled, because now he could call someone, someone who _knows_ him, someone who-

The stone was knocked out of his hands, and Taako was pressed up against the wall- there was the dull chill of a blade pressed against his neck- someone was holding a knife up to his throat.

“Give me everything ya got,” The voice was slurring, and all too close to Taako’s ear. He flinched, impulsively trying to pull away, which only earned him a light cut against his throat- enough to sting and warn him to not try that again. Taako gasped, allowing the man to push him again into the wall. “Don’t make me repeat myself-”

Taako’s voice was shaking as he spoke. “T-the stone, it’s down on the floor-” His attacker, stepped closer, allowing a small beam of light to rest on his face. It was clearly a man- he looked like he was dragonborn and was wearing black clothes that mostly covered his face. He chuckled. “You think I’m stupid enough to lean down and grab that? Nah- give me everything that is in your pockets,” Taako hesitated for only a moment, but that was enough for the blade to flash, and dig across his arm. Taako cried out, only to have his mouth covered by the man. “Empty. Your. Fucking. Pockets.”

Taako slowly reached down, not wanting to anger the man any more, but that only seemed to do the opposite. “How about this. Every time you waste my time, I’ll cut a little piece of your beautiful hair off.” Taako was gasping, it felt like he couldn’t move his hands as the man took his blade, scraping it across Taako’s face and to his head before cleanly taking a chuck of Taako’s hair out. The action was painless, but seeing the man holding more than a few strands of Taako’s hair was horrifying.

Taako stuck his hands into his pockets, pulling out whatever he could find- first the wand, which the man took immediately, inspecting it.

“This is a fancy wand. You got a lot of money? You some kind of wizard or some shit?” Taako shook his head. _Was he? What if he was wealthy? He had a considerable amount of gold pieces with him-”_ His train of thought was cut off by another piece of his hair being cut off. “Nah, you couldn’t be a wizard. You are too stupid for that shit.” A beat as the man put the wand into his own bag. “Did I say you could stop? Keep emptying your shit.” Taako willed his hands to stop shaking enough so he could take off all of the rings- some of them looked a little tacky, but something told him that they could actually be worth a hefty sum.

The man smiled as Taako slid the rings off. “Keep going.”

He knew that the only thing that he had left was the bag of gold pieces. Taako didn’t count the exact amount, but judging by the weight, there was a lot in there. Another scrape of the knife, this time digging across his chest, made Taako yelp and hurriedly pull out the bag. The man cackled and greedily took it. “You’ve been holding back, haven’t you?”

“That’s- that’s all I have, please-” Taako finally gasped out as the man put the gold pieces into his bag. The man raised an eyebrow, swooped down and picked up the stone of farspeech. It hung from the string which the man held, and they both watched as it lit up.

“-ko? Taako, are you there?”

It was a man. At the noise of his voice, Taako’s heart dropped and jumped at the same time, there was a ringing in his ears, and something deep inside of Taako _screamed._

The man chuckled lowly before dropping the stone once again. With a smooth movement, he moved his foot over the stone and crushed it.

While he was doing that, the voice continued to talk. “Taako, please-” Then turned to static, then nothingness as the stone crumbled beneath the man’s foot.

“No-” Taako gasped. That was his one chance, it was how he could remember how he was, and now it was gone-

“Oops.” The man laughed, shoving Taako against the wall once more, and vanished.

Now that he was free, Taako slid down, his back against the wall, and sobbed. There were many cuts across his body, many of which were bleeding, but his eyes only focused on the pile of grey dust that was in front of him.

Taako was _lost._ He was lost and he had no way of knowing where he was, or who he was, or where his home was-

Taako sat there, crying for an immeasurable amount of time. When he finally rubbed his eyes, it was still dark out- he had no way of telling how much time had passed. Taako pushed himself off of the ground and started to walk.

He had nowhere to go, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t keep moving. That was probably his only option at this point- keep moving.

The streets were dark, and marginally terrifying, but Taako kept walking. He walked through neighborhoods, through alleyways, trying to keep quiet and not cause any trouble.

He knew one thing now, at least. His name _was_ Taako. Or at least, someone out there called him Taako. That felt right- but it was one of the few things that _did_ at this point. But who was that man? Who was-

“Hey, babe,” Taako had arrived in front of a bar, and in front of him was a human man, clearly drunk. He was leaning against the wall, smiling dopily. Chills raced through Taako’s body again, and he took a step back. “You come here alone?” The human took a staggering step towards Taako.

“I-”

“How ‘bout this, babe-” The man hiccupped. He was fucking _wasted._ “You come back to my place- I’ve always wanted to fuck an elf-”

“Honey!” A feminine, clearly sober voice came to Taako’s rescue, and an arm linked with Taako’s. “I was wondering where you went, you just vanished on me,” A short woman was standing next to Taako, and she most certainly was _not_ familiar. “Let’s go home,” She said, leading Taako away from the drunk man. Taako stumbled as she tugged him, and the chill stayed in his bones until they turned the corner and she dropped his arm.

“That guy was totally creepy- he tried to hit on me too,” They were standing under a street lantern, giving Taako a better look at her. She was a half elf and had curly blond hair which was pulled back into a ponytail. Taako was almost certain that he didn’t know her, but the way that she had easily led him away could have not been an act- “Hey- are you okay? You have a cut-”

“Are we dating?” Taako blurted out. The half-elf looked stunned for more than a few moments and shook her head.

“No? I don’t even know your name- and you are attractive but not really my thing, not really into men-” Taako sighed loudly, and leaned his weight against the lantern pole. “Are you okay?”

“I don’t know,” Taako mumbled. “I don’t know anything.”

“What do you mean?” The woman paused, before sticking her hand out. “And I’m Brigid, by the way. Brigid Sow.” Taako dutifully shook her hand.

“I’m Taako. Just… Taako.” He sighed. If he didn’t know this woman, maybe she could at least help him get his bearings. “I don’t know who I am.”

“What?”

“I must have lost my memories, or _something_. I was in a train station, and I got on a train, but all I knew was that my name might be Taako, and now I’m here.”

“Oh.” Whatever Brigid was expecting, it was not this. “Fuck.”

“Exactly.”

“Then where did the cuts come from?” Taako raised a hand to his cheek and winced as he touched one of the many scrapes on his body. There was blood on his hand when he pulled it away.

“Some creep stole my shit, cut me up a bit.” Taako explained.

“Shit. Uh. Want me to take you to the cops or something? Maybe they can help you-”

It felt like someone had punched Taako in the gut- “ _No._ ” He hissed. Brigid took a step back, startled. “Sorry- uh- no- no cops.” Something in him was telling him to fix this on his own, he didn’t need cops.

“Well, Eastborne cops are shit anyway.” Brigid still looked nervous.

“You live here?” Brigid shook her head and started rifling through her bag.

“No- I live in Arcton. A thirty-minute train ride from here, I own a floral shop.” Brigid held out a small piece of paper towards him, presumably a business card before hesitating. “You can come with me, if you want. My train leaves soon.” Taako raised an eyebrow as her face scrunched up. “Now that sounded creepy, I don’t mean it like that, I just mean maybe we can get you some help, I know people in Arcton, and I can help clean up your cuts- I only offer because it seems like you have no other place to go, and-”

Taako waved his hand airily, cutting her off.

“Sure. Yeah, I’ll go with you. As long as you aren’t some crazy murderer.” Brigid laughs, and shakes her head.

“The only thing that I murder is…” She crinkles her nose. “... Nothing. I can’t think of a single joke I can make here.” She started to walk down the sidewalk. “The train station opens at five, and the train leaves at five thirty, so we should head there now.” Taako looked up at the sky, and sure enough, morning was breaking.

“What time is it?”

“Four thirty.” As she said that Taako suddenly felt very heavy on his feet. He had been awake for a very long time… Probably longer than someone in his situation should stay up.

Regardless, Taako followed the half-elf down the sidewalk, listening to her chatter about her shop and various flowers. A shiver went through him when he saw where he was mugged, a small pile of grey dust still where his only chance of getting home was. But then he looked at Brigid, who was smiling at the train station worker who was opening the doors, and he thought that he might be okay. For the time being, that is. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaah brigid! my love, my heart, my soul! shes really the only oc in this story but shes mucho important so give my girl some love please
> 
> keep those comments coming! they honestly do motivate me to write a lot!! let me know what you think of this chapter!! share this work with your friends!!  
> but seriously, thank you for reading haha i didn't think anyone would ever read this story even tho ive spent like a trillion years on it. every comment i get i really treasure, and go back to read multiple times.


	3. Chapter 3

“Make yourself at home.” Brigid said, dropping her bag on the couch. “Mi casa su casa, and whatnot.”

“Brigid…” Taako started but faltered. She turned around to face him, concerned.

“What is it?”

“When you said you liked plants… I didn’t know you meant you liked plants like this.”

Brigid’s apartment was a flat above her store, but they went through the back door so Taako had yet to see her shop (which was called Soil ‘n’ Pot). For a second, he thought they had gone to the wrong place, that this was the actual store, because her home was _covered_ in plants. On every surface there was some kind of potted plant, and a few were even hanging from the ceiling, forcing Taako to duck to avoid hitting them. Brigid was much shorter than Taako and walked into the kitchen without any problem.

“I literally sell and take care of plants for a living, Taako. It’s not weird that I have a few plants in my home.”

“No,” Taako agreed. “But this is more than a few. There is like fifty in the living room, and I can see more out on the fire escape.” Brigid rolled her eyes, but she was smiling.

“There is only seven in the living room, and I have a vegetable garden on the fire escape.”

“Safety at its finest.”

“If there ever is a fire, I could just make roasted peppers or something.”

“You are willing to die for some roasted peppers?”

“If I had the right seasoning with me, then yeah.” Taako smirked and walked over to the window to inspect the garden. It was small, but it looked like some of the produce was already coming in. “I harvested some carrots yesterday, if you want me to make some kind of stir fry or fried rice with it. But it’s technically still the morning, so maybe some kind of carrot-based breakfast food.” She added thoughtfully.

Taako shrugged and moved into the kitchen where Brigid was. She looked up as he entered and motioned towards a stool. “Sit. We have to cut your hair, if that is okay. Whoever robbed you kind of fucked up your hair.” Taako nodded, hand automatically going back to touch his hair. Even without looking at it he knew it was choppy, and gross. “But first, let’s clean up those cuts. I don’t know where all you were cut, but if there is any place that you don’t feel comfortable with me touching, let me know.” Taako shrugged again.

On the train ride here, Taako took a short nap, and woke up even more dazed than he was before. Brigid was there when he woke up and continued to send him worried glances when she thought he couldn’t see. She had every right to be a little freaked out- some weird guy with no memory suddenly joining you on your trip home? Brigid explained that she was in Eastborne trying to promote her store, but she hated the town and tried to come there as sparsely as she could. _“Eastborne is where a lot of shady people live… To be honest I am glad I took you with me because you might have gotten into a lot more trouble if you continued to just wander around with no memory or protection.”_ Brigid had said.

“Taako, are you okay?” Brigid asked, jolting Taako out of his thoughts. “You can sleep soon, I just want to get these cuts cleaned. After that, I have a spare bedroom. And then we can clean up your hair.”

“‘Mmkay.”  Brigid approached him tactfully with a towel, clearly trying to be cautious. “I’m not going to bite you.” Brigid frowned, but got to work.

“I know. This situation is just weird. You really don’t remember anything?” Taako shook his head, but then hissed as his cuts stung from the rubbing alcohol, making Brigid wince and mutter apologies under her breath.

“Yup. Could get someone to cast zone of truth on me, but you wouldn’t get much out of me. Everything is pretty empty up there.” _Just an idiot elf,_ Taako thought.

Brigid tilted her head, nodding at something across the room. “If push comes to shove, I could always cast it.” Taako followed her gaze to a few instruments that were propped up against the wall- a lute, a mandolin, the works.

“Aw, natch.”

“Been playing since I was a kid.” Brigid shrugged, still focused on her work. “Don’t have a lot of use for magic but I can cast a few spells now and then.” She paused after finishing the cuts on his arms but held the towel out to him. “Here. The bathroom is down the hall on the left- don’t think you want a stranger to clean up the cuts on other places.”

“Didn’t think I wanted to go to a strangers home either,” Taako joked back, but took the towel and followed her directions. He clicked the lock behind him and turned to the mirror.

And stared.

Taako hadn’t seen himself this whole time- he may have remembered the way his face was shaped, the sharp color of his eyes, but had never stopped to think of it.

One of the first things that Taako noticed was Brigid was right- his hair was fucked up. It looked like at some point it had been long, smooth, shiny blond hair. Now sections were cut off, and it looked a little rough due to the few days without brushing it. There were dark circles under Taako’s eyes, and closer inspection revealed that it was from both lack of sleep and makeup that had just smeared.

Ever so slowly, Taako started to take off his robe. He only had a thin, brightly colored shirt on underneath, but something caught his eye, making him gently take off the shirt too. Taako stood in front of the mirror, bare-chested.

There were scars all over his body. Most of them were thin, only a few inches long, but they were scattered all around his chest, and upper arms. Who the fuck is he?

Taako stood in front of the mirror, transfixed for a few minutes by the scars, mind racing as he tried to remember where he got these- what had happened to him? There was a soft knock at the bathroom door.

“Taako? You okay in there?” Brigid.

“Y-” Taako’s voice got caught in his throat and he sounded strangled for a moment. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Yeah, be right out.” Taako threw his shirt back on, opting to hang the fancy robe on his arm. It wasn’t until he was unlocking the door that he realized that he had been so caught up in inspecting himself that he had forgotten to clean the cut- whatever. Taako’ll be fine.

Brigid seemed pleased when he came back out and took the towel from his hands. “Now, do you want to get some rest before I cut your hair? You look like you are about to fall over where you are standing, bud.” As she spoke, another wave of tiredness rushed through Taako’s body, but he stayed put.

“Let’s just do this.” Taako plopped himself down on the stool again, watching as Brigid took out a pair of scissors. She looked more anxious than Taako felt. “Uh- have you ever done this before?”

The way that Brigid yelped when she accidently dropped the scissors (narrowly missing her own foot) answered his question for her. “Shit.” She looks up apologetically, but Taako waves his hand, beckoning her closer. “Do it.”

Brigid stands in front of him for a moment, shifting from foot to foot, clearly trying to decide the best course of action for this. Finally, she stepped behind Taako, and cut. A chill was sent down Taako’s spine, but he ignored it. “Aren’t you supposed to put a towel around my neck? Clearly you have never done this before.” That got a very nervous laugh out of Brigid, but she stepped away and got a new towel, wrapping it around his shoulders.

“Do you want a mirror or something?” Brigid offered.

“No. Do you _need_ one, for cutting hair?” She paused, but Taako then heard the scissors cutting again.

“No. I know what I am doing.”

“You do?” Taako replied, amused, but let Brigid get to work. They fell into a silence for a long time- he had no way of knowing what time it was, or how much had passed. Brigid circled around him, cutting away seemingly random sections, occasionally stepping back to look at her work.

Finally, after what felt like eons, Brigid stepped away.

“Done.”

Still clutching the towel around him, Taako stood up, and looked down. There was a lot of hair on the ground. Like, a lot. Taako didn’t know that he had so much hair- was there any left on his head? A quick raise of his hand told him that there indeed was, just not much.

"Here," Brigid handed him a small mirror. Taako took it hesitantly and raised it.

He had a pixie cut- and he fucking rocked it. Yeah, it looked a bit messy, and it was a little uneven, but he still looked pretty fucking awesome. "You like it?"

"Hells yeah." Taako replied, smiling and handing the mirror back. He ran his fingers through his hair, marveling in how short it was. “It feels weird to have short hair.”

“Really?” There was a clutter, and when Taako turned around Brigid had a small book in her hands, and she was scribbling something down. “That probably means that you kept your hair long, usually.”

“What’s that?” Brigid looked up and saw that he was pointing at the book. She smiled and held it up. It was a simple, leather bound journal.

“This is how we are going to get you home. We should keep track of the things you remember, in case either one of us forget. And we can piece it all together, like a mystery or something.” Taako smiled, and Brigid beamed right back at him.

He opened his mouth to say something else but instead swayed where he stood. Brigid tutted, and grabbed his arm.

"You need to sleep. Here, give me that towel. I don't have any clothes that would fit you, but we can get some when you wake up." Brigid gently led him down the hallway again, this time turning to the right. She led him into a small room, this one with less plants. All that it had was a small writing desk, a drawer that looked empty, and a bed. Taako let the towel slip off of his shoulders and walked until he fell, face first into the bed.

Sleep overtook him almost instantaneously, but before it did, he could hear Brigid moving around, and then shutting the door behind her.

Sleep was a pleasant break from all that had happened, although he didn't dream. Or maybe he did, and he was having a nightmare. All he knew was that it was dark, everything was dark, and Taako was floating. He wasn’t flying or falling. He was simply there, existing where nothing else existed.

            When Taako woke up, he didn't know where he was. But then he saw the plants on the windowsill, and heard noise coming from the kitchen, and remembered. He was with Brigid. He was with Brigid, and he still didn’t remember anything. That meant that this wasn’t all some weird, fucked up dream, and he wasn’t about to wake up in his bed, at home, wherever the fuck that might be.

He delayed getting up for as long as he could, but eventually got bored. He saw that there were new clothes on the desk, a plain t-shirt and some jeans. They looked like they would fit quite loosely on him, but they were clean clothes, so Taako took them. Slipping out of the clothes that were now slightly muddy at the ends, and covered in a thin layer of dust, Taako tried on the new clothes. Just as he thought, they were too big, and the fabric felt rough on his skin, but it was clean.

Brigid was in the kitchen when he found her, leaning against the island. She beamed when Taako entered and motioned to a plate full of food. Taako gave a wan smile and inspected the food in front of him. It was some kind of soup, and true to Brigid’s word, it looked like it was full of carrots.

“I’m glad those clothes fit- I got them out of storage for now. We can go get new clothes later on, things that actually fit.” Her back was to him, she was ladling some of the soup into her own bowl.

“Sit, we need to talk,” Brigid said, pointing to a bar stool. After Taako was seated, she passed him a fork and a glass of water. He gratefully took both, only then realizing how parched (and starved) he was. He had no idea how long it had been since he had last had anything to eat, and whatever this was that Brigid had made- it was amazing. It was bright orange, and warm, but Taako could vaguely taste squash, and some kind of bean. “Is it good?” Taako nodded, making Brigid smile. “Good. It was my mom’s recipe; I haven’t tried it out in years.”

When Brigid took a seat across from him, he could almost feel the mood shift. “Taako, I don’t know you, like at all, but clearly you don’t either.” Brigid winced. “That was a bad way to start this.” He stared at her while taking a drink of water. “I don’t want to kick you out- I want to help.”

“I’m not some fucking broken-” Taako started to shoot back but knew what she meant. Still, the concept of being treated like he was fragile infuriated him more than anything else (and felt familiar).

“I’m not trying to say that. But you can’t just go out on the streets with no memory, Taako. We don’t even know where your home is, we don’t even know your fucking last name!” Brigid’s eyes were bright, but she wasn’t angry- she was passionate. That was enough to startle Taako into silence. “Just- stay with me for a while. You can earn your stay by working at my shop, and we can try to figure out who you are.” Brigid stuck her hand out, offering a handshake.

This was Taako’s golden gate. His way to get home- his _help._ And it wasn’t like he was going to be coddled- he could earn his keep.

“Aw hell.” Taako muttered, but reached out for Brigid, watching as their hands clasped together. Brigid beamed, and nodded.

“You can have the rest of the day off- technically we got home yesterday, but you slept all day, so I’m not gonna make you do anything today.” Brigid stood up, leaving her soup half eaten. “But I do have to open up the shop today. Feel free to come down if you get bored, but you should really rest. I have fantasy cable, so see if there is anything you like.” Brigid was chattering as she moved around, slipping on muddy hiking boots. She also pointed out the small journal from yesterday. “If you remember anything, write it down. Or get me. Just go out the front door, and down the staircase until you come to the big metal door. Through there you will be in the backroom, which is where I usually am if there are no customers. If I’m not, just go through the large doorway to get to the storefront.”

Taako blinked and took another sip of his soup. There was a lot of things happening right now. He had a home? A temporary one, at least. And a job.

_And a friend,_ Taako mentally added, as Brigid beamed at him one last time before leaving the flat. The door slammed shut behind her, and Brigid’s clomping footsteps faded as she walked down the stairs.

The quiet of the flat was peaceful. All of the windows were open, and Taako could hear people talking on the streets down below, and wagons rumbling by. Plants rustled in the soft breeze, and Taako found himself with a small smile on his face. As he continued to eat his soup, Taako reached up and ran his fingers through his newly shorter haircut. He tried to remember what it looked like before it was short, before it had gotten cut up by the robber, but found nothing. Taako sighed out loud and went to put away his bowl.

At some point, Taako had migrated to the couch in the living room and turned on the TV. He flicked through channels, trying to find something that he liked. Eventually he landed on a dating show and felt a little flicker of contentment in his chest. Taako reached, and grabbed the journal, and a pen.

Under Brigid’s messy scrawl, Taako wrote _likes bad reality TV shows_.

With the soft sunlight coming through the window, Taako fell asleep to the sound of Fantasy Bachelor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments feed my children and keep my crops growing thx
> 
> also the next chapter is saved in my computer as 'oh worm :(' so teehee sorry


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long, but its my longest chap so far!!

Kravitz hadn’t been sleeping. Technically, he didn’t need sleep, _technically_ , he was dead, so he shouldn’t need sleep. He’d tried, the first night that Taako was gone, but eventually gave up. Kravitz presumed that sleep would come easier once he knew that Taako was safe, with Ren, so by the time Taako would call the next day, he could go to sleep.

By the second night, when there was still no word from Taako, Kravitz didn’t even try to sleep, instead pacing back and forth in the kitchen, stone of farspeech clutched in his hand. Kravitz had spent months actually _sleeping_ , that he had gotten used to it. So, while he certainly didn’t need it, that didn’t mean that he couldn’t be tired. When Angus had come downstairs in the middle of the night for a glass of water, Kravitz pretended that he was just finishing up some work, but Kravitz knew that the boy wasn’t fooled (Angus was most likely smarter than all of them combined). When Angus finally went back to bed, Kravitz called Taako once more.

No answer- the call didn’t even go through, like wherever Taako was, he had no service. Which made sense for about twelve hours, but then when it got to the point that Taako should have reached his destination, Kravitz really started to panic.

So, he called Ren.

Turns out, Ren had no idea that Taako was coming to meet her. She apparently hadn’t heard from him in a few days, he had briefly mentioned coming by, but never gave any dates. That was a total Taako move, not telling Ren. He probably wanted to magically appear in one of the classes, giving the students and professors heart attacks.

The next person he called was Lup; in hindsight, he maybe should have waited a bit longer to call her, wait until he was more composed and hopefully had more information.

“Lup,” He started the call, but the elf was already talking over him.

“Is Taako there? He said he would call me last night, but didn’t, the dipshit. I would have rifted right over there to kick his ass, I had to tell him about this restaurant that Bear and I went to a few nights ago-”

Kravitz took a deep breath, trying to steel himself but also keep himself from objecting to her using ‘rift’ as a verb.

“Lup.”

“-and so if you could just hand the stone over to him, so I can give him a few choice words about how whatever he was doing is in no way more important than talking to his dearest and only sister-”

“Lup.” The desperation in his voice must have finally bled through, because Lup faltered.

“What?”

“I don’t know where Taako is.”

“What the fuck does that mean?” If Kravitz didn’t know Lup, ( _if he didn’t know Taako_ ) he wouldn’t have heard the slight edge to her voice. Disappearing, or going missing was a touchy subject with the twins (nice job, Taako).

“I mean, he said he was going to visit Ren two days ago, and I haven’t heard from him. I was hoping that you had heard from him since, but I guess not.” Lup was silent for a second too long, and Kravitz found himself fearing the outburst.

He was _tired,_ okay? He had no clue where his husband was, and all he could think about how the last thing they did was argue, and now Taako was _gone_ with no trace, and he couldn’t fucking go to sleep.

Lup was silent for another beat before, “I’m on my way over.” It may have been the middle of the night, and Angus may have been asleep just upstairs, but Kravitz mumbled something about the door being unlocked, and placed the stone on the kitchen counter.

Taako and Kravitz had spent a lot of time apart from each other- more in the beginning of their relationship rather than recently, but this was different. Something felt _wrong,_ something was _wrong._ Something beyond the discomfort of being away from his love, something way worse. Every fiber in his being was screaming that Taako needed help, but Kravitz just didn’t know _how_ to help him.

When the door opened, Kravitz met Lup and Barry at the door.

“Angus is still sleeping- I don’t want to wake him unless it is necessary.” Kravitz spoke first, trying to keep his voice low. Lup strode past him- frankly, Lup looked _pissed_ , but Barry gave Kravitz a small smile. When they got to the kitchen, Lup was angrily making a cup of coffee, already have spent enough time in the house to know where everything was.

“Lup tried calling Taako after you guys talked,” Barry explained. “It was like he was out of range, or something. I hope he didn’t break or lose his stone.”

“But if he did, he knows to borrow one from someone else, and call us so we can rift him the fuck out of there.” Lup cut in. Kravitz had never seen someone stir cream into their coffee so angrily before. Kravitz sighed and sank into a chair.

“Ren had no idea that Taako was going to visit her and the school. He had told me that she was going to meet him at the train station but-”

“Why didn’t you just take him?” Lup cut in again. There was fire in her eyes- she looked tense.

“He wouldn’t let me.” A soft chuckle from Kravitz as he rubbed his hand over his eyes. “We had a whole argument about it- I wanted to just make a rift, and drop him off, or maybe even stay the night with him, but he wouldn’t let me. The morning after we fought, he was gone.”

“Why don’t we just wait until the morning?” Barry stepped in, seeing Lup charge up another response. “We can all rest, and deal with this in the morning. Maybe Magnus could come over- or Merle, maybe Merle can ask Pan for help.” He gently took the still full cup of coffee from his wife’s hands. “Or maybe Taako will call in the morning. Come on, Lup.” Lup sighed but wove her fingers in with her husband’s. Barry nodded at Kravitz as he led Lup to the guest room where they have stayed in often enough to call their own. Kravitz watched them go, mind swirling.

_‘Maybe Merle can ask Pan for help’_ Barry’s words echoed in his head as an idea dawned. He scrambled to get out of his seat, grabbing his coat, and stone. Kravitz had to make a quick visit to his goddess.

Usually, to summon the Raven Queen, or to at least request her presence, it took feathers from crows, ink, sacred symbols, but this situation called for less formality. Plus, at this point Kravitz felt like he had done enough for the Raven Queen to bypass the formalities. Tightening his tie one last time, Kravitz cut a direct rift to her throne room.

Surprisingly, she wasn’t sitting upon her throne like she usually was, but instead was sitting at a small table beside the throne, a teacup in her hands. The Raven Queen clearly was not expecting Kravitz but gave him a warm smile as he stepped through.

“Kravitz, I wasn’t expecting you-” Another rift cut through, this one different than the dark cut through space that Lup, Barry, himself, and all other children of the Raven Queen could make. This one was a bright white, nearly blinding as a figure stepped through. The Raven Queen smiled, this time not at him but at Istus, who stepped into the room. Kravitz immediately felt like he had intruded in on some personal moment, suddenly recognizing the extra teacup that was on the table.

“My queen,” He said lowly, bowing. “Lady Istus,” Kravitz kept his head down until the Raven Queen addressed him directly.

“Kravitz- what brings you here tonight?” Kravitz looked up, just in time to see Istus glide over to the table and sit at the chair opposite of the Raven Queen’s. He had only seen Istus on few occasions- she even showed up to their wedding, but only to gift the two with a rather large quilt that she had made. Thinking of the quilt reminded Kravitz why he was here- and that the queen had asked him a question.

“Taako-” He blurted out, catching the attention of the goddess of fate. “Taako, he’s uh- missing. Er- I mean, I don’t know where he is.”

Kravitz could handle a lot of shit. On a regular basis he guided people to the Eternal Stockade- so clearly the people he met on the daily were not happy to see him. It was all too common for him to come home covered in animal blood, or whatever sacrifice the cult he had taken down had decided to use. Of course, the material things like that were easy to rid of, with a flick of a wrist it would disappear. But some things on this job he couldn’t unsee, things he couldn’t unhear.

So, Kravitz could handle a lot.

But in the past three days, he had argued with the love of his life, woken up to see that he wasn’t there, spent two days worried _sick_ about the love of his life, have it made very clear to him that his sister-in-law thought that this was all his fault, and had hardly any fucking sleep.

Kravitz took a deep breath and started to speak.

“Taako has been struggling with his memory lately- first it was little things, he would lose track of a conversation, but then he would forget who _I_ was. He went on a trip a few days ago without me, and now isn’t answering my calls. I was hoping that you could help, my liege.”

“Are you sure he didn’t just lose his communication device?” Istus asked, pouring herself a cup of tea.

“I- I think that something is wrong. I fear that he may have lost his memory, maybe he lost his way or-”

“Kravitz.” The Raven’s Queen booming voice stopped him in his tracks. She sounded powerful, as strong as always, but now she almost sounded regretful. “You know I cannot interfere with things in this way. If Taako was dead, or involved with a death somehow, then that would be different, I might be able to help, but…” Maybe she continued to speak, but his ears were filled with white noise, because if she couldn’t help, who could and-

_Wait._

“My queen, my apologies, but did you say-” The Raven Queen nodded, allowing the tiniest of smiles to grace her face.

“Yes. Taako is not dead. As far as I can tell, he is alive, but I cannot see where he is, or what he is doing.”

_Taako is alive_ , Kravitz wanted to scream from the rooftops. That was one of the first pieces of secure information that he had received in these past days. He let his eyes drift over to Istus, who seemed to be deep in thought.

“I-”

“This story has already been woven.” Istus spoke suddenly, dropping a sugar cube into her cube before distractedly stirring.

“What?”

“I cannot tell you much, and for that I am very sorry.” She continued. “But you must know that this story has already been stitched together, it is all in place.”

“Story?” Kravitz sputtered. He could feel himself getting angrier by the moment- this most certainly was not the way to speak to a goddess, especially one who had information that he needed, but goddamnit, Kravitz’s husband was missing, probably lost his memory, and all alone. “Excuse me for my crude language, but my fucking husband is out there- I need to find him, and if you couldn’t tell, this isn’t some fucking game-”

“Kravitz.” The Raven Queen stared him down, giving him a look that caused shame to rush through him.

He blinked, still feeling the anger, still feeling the loss, but also felt regret, for the way he had spoken. Spoke to a _goddess_ , no less. Kravitz bowed his head once more.

“I am incredibly sorry for my harsh words.” Istus hummed, and when Kravitz looked up again, she was smiling at him.

“No need to apologize. I understand your frustration, and I do wish to help you. Taako is one who is dear to my heart, and I assure you that I am doing what I can to help.” She nodded at the Raven Queen. “We have been working on a cure for Taako- a way to help his mind, ease it.”

“I believe Pan had a few ideas-” The Raven Queen added, before nodding at Kravitz. “If I find a way to aid, I will let you know. Get some rest, Kravitz.”

Knowing when he was being clearly dismissed, Kravitz bowed his head once more before turning around and making a rift into his living room. Kravitz was only mildly surprised when he stepped through, and a young boy with curly hair was sitting on the couch, reading a book.

“I believe it’s past your best time, Angus.” Kravitz felt too tired to scold the boy, and instead sat down on the couch, closing his eyes. Angus hesitated for only a moment before climbing into Kravitz’s lap, leaving the book behind.

“I heard you and Aunt Lup arguing,” Angus mumbled.

“We weren’t arguing. Lup was just upset, and I happened to be in her line of sight.” Angus started fiddling with Kravitz’s buttons on his shirt.

“I heard her and Uncle Barry talking after they went to their room, they said-”

“What do we say about eavesdropping?”

Angus sighed and buried his head into Kravitz’s chest. Kravitz wrapped his arms around the boy, standing up from the couch. “Come on. You need to sleep.” Angus mumbled something that was impossible to hear but held onto Kravitz tighter as he took them to his bedroom.

Angus finally looked up when Kravitz started to lower him in his bed, seemingly relieved that they were in Taako and Kravitz’s room. Angus squirmed under the covers, eyes already closing.

Once Kravitz had his own pajamas on, he turned off the lights and slid under the covers. It certainly was strange, to not have Taako on the other side of the mattress, making bad pick-up lines and trying to hit on Kravitz using awful nicknames. Angus curled himself as close as Kravitz as possible and was out in minutes.

Kravitz spent the rest of the night falling in and out of light sleep, but thankfully it was only emptiness, and nothingness. Personally, he didn’t think he could handle any nightmares- not until Taako was back, at least. _And he was alive- Taako was out there, alive._

The possibility of Taako being hurt, or worse, dead, had not occurred to Kravitz. Maybe he just hadn’t let his mind go that far. But now he knew one thing at least- Taako was alive. He was alive, and Kravitz was going to find him and bring him home.

When the sun began to stream through the window, Kravitz gave up on sleep. Slowly getting out of bed, Kravitz pressed a kiss to Angus’ head.

The Raven Queen wasn’t going to call him out for a job- she wouldn’t do something like that, not now, so there was no need to change out of the sweatpants and a t-shirt. Wandering into the kitchen, Kravitz picked his stone up. His first instinct was to call Taako, see if he could get through to him, but instead called someone else.

“‘Ello?” Magnus’ voice was tired, reminding Kravitz that it was indeed still very early in the morning, and some people did have regular sleeping schedules.

“Sorry to wake you, Magnus, I could just call back at a later time-”

“No, no, no! It’s fine, I was actually going to call you and Taako later today, see what was up.”

Maybe it wasn’t the best to bring more people into this situation, not when it was still so uncertain. “Kravitz?” Magnus urged, and he realized that he had fallen silent.

“Can you come over?” His voice was quiet, although Kravitz wasn’t sure who’s sake it was for. There was only a beat of silence before Magnus spoke again.

“I’m on my way. I should get there before nightfall, okay?” A click as Magnus hung up, and a creak as Kravitz settled down into a chair. He let his head drop into his hands, wishing not for the first time that Taako was there.

* * *

 

Lup hardly talked to him for half of the day, other than drilling him for more information, and leaving, saying something about going to find Taako.  Kravitz almost regretted calling her, but he knew that if she had heard about this any later, she would have been even more furious about it all. Barry stuck around a little bit after, only to apologize.

“I know that this probably really sucks for you too-” Barry started, but then seemed to take into account Kravitz’s shaking hands and circles under his eyes. “Well, that’s an understatement. But this is like one of Lup’s biggest fears, realized. She saw what her disappearance did to Taako, did to all of us, and now she has to go through it herself.”

Kravitz smiled and nodded. He could hear Angus in the living room, doing something, and lowered his voice.

“I talked to the Raven Queen. And Istus, for that matter.” Whatever Barry had been expecting, it was not that.

“Really? What did they say?”

“They can’t help us. I’m afraid I lost my temper on them- Istus was talking about how this story is set in stone, or something like that, and I lost it.”

“Shit.” Barry ran his fingers through his hair, making it stick up even more. “So, I guess we are really on our own with this.”

Kravitz hummed in response. Barry stood up and rubbed his face with his hand. “I’m going to go catch up to Lup. I’ll let you know if we find anything.” Kravitz watched as Barry left, quietly shutting the door behind him. Then, he got a drink. _Taako always said it’s never too early for a drink,_ he mused to himself as he pulled out the whiskey. Hopefully Angus would stay asleep for a little while longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> teehee i lov this chapter but how about you guys. thoughts? threats to me, the author? leave them in the comments below  
> or just tell me your favorite restaurant and what you like to get there because thats a fun question!  
> xoxoxoxoxo


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Fuck.”
> 
> “You’ll get it- hey, you actually got yarrow instead of hemlock today!” Brigid said, heading back to the storage.
> 
> “But on that note-” Taako shot a dazzling smile at the now concerned customer before following Brigid. “Why the fuck do you have poisonous hemlock in your store?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry this took so long!!

“Taako! Can you get a few asters for me please?” Taako took a step back and surveyed the absolutely fucking _massive_ room of flowers, most of them without labels.

“Which ones are those?” He called back.

“The purple ones, with thin petals!” Brigid responded. Thankfully, there was a bucket of purple flowers in front of him, so he grabbed a handful of those and carried them out to the front room.

The front room of the Soil ‘n’ Pot was exactly what you would expect. It was filled with flowers, planter pots, soil, fertilizer, the whole deal. Even the counter that had the cash register was covered in plants. Brigid was talking to a customer when he came in and wrinkled her nose at the flowers he was carrying. “Those are callistephus chinensis, Taako. Asters are flatter.”

The customer was a regular, a tall half-orc woman, named Alix. She was a friend of Brigid’s and met Taako on his second day of the job. Now he was on his tenth day of the job, and while he was doing marginally better at figuring out which flowers were which, he still kind of sucked at it.

“Good morning, Taako,” Alix said warmly. Taako would have seen her bat her eyes at him but was too busy inspecting the flowers in his hands.

“Are you sure these aren’t what you wanted?”

“Yup. Completely sure. Go and get some asters, Taako.” Brigid took it upon herself to shove him through the backdoor again. Taako grumbled under his breath, but went back to the room, and found what looked like it was an aster. Part of him wanted to shove the _calli-step-are-us chiny-sis_ or whatever the fuck they were called into the closest bucket, but he knew that Brigid would yell at him if he did. So Taako carefully placed them in the correct bucket and grabbed the asters- or what he _hoped_ to be asters. He didn’t want to keep going back and forth.

Brigid was a nice person, but when it came to teaching Taako the ropes of the Soil ‘n’ Pot, she was ruthless. In the past week and a half of working, he has learned more about flowers than he ever thought he would. Taako, unfortunately, knew more about flowers than he did about his own past.

Everything about Taako was still a blank- he has only figured out small, meaningless facts about him. Taako _hated_ casseroles, but liked pineapple on pizza (much to Brigid’s chagrin).  Thankfully, they found a common ground with movies, they both liked the shittiest and cheesiest shows that cable tv had to offer.

But Taako still didn’t know anything _important,_ like where he lived, or where he came from. Why did he get on a train in the first place? Did he even get on the correct train? It was shit like this that kept him up late at night, watching Fantasy Chopped. He did have nightmares, but Taako never remembered them in the morning. The only sign of an unpeaceful sleep was the sweat that covered Taako and the bedsheets that were strewn about.

Taako grabbed three asters, and started to head back out, only to pass Brigid.

“Why don’t you finish up Alix’s transaction?” She whispered as they passed and reached out to grasp his upper arm. Then Brigid winked, confusing Taako even further.

“But I don’t know how to use the cash register,” Taako glanced up at Alix, who was smiling at them from the front room.

“I can help you, just-” The bell on the door rang, and Brigid dropped her hand from his arm. “Never mind. Go see if the new customer needs anything, and I will finish up Alix’s transaction.” She took the flowers from Taako’s hands. “These are camas.”

“Fuuuuuck.” Taako groaned but headed out to the front room. Alix smiled again when he passed, seriously, did she ever stop smiling? He nodded his head at her, before going to track down the new customer. Taako was grateful that Brigid had introduced him to some of her friends, but _Gods,_ they were weird.

The rest of the day was similar to the past days in the store. Brigid would quiz Taako on different flowers, show him new jobs around the shop. It almost seemed like the chores never ended- how did she run the place by herself? Brigid and him would argue over the music to play in the store, Taako would horribly mangle the name of a flower.

At one point, Brigid asked for some lavender, and Taako scoffed. Lavender? Pssh, that would be easy. When he brought it back out, Brigid cringed- _she physically cringed_ \- and shook her head.

“That’s a Russian sage, Taako, I-” Taako squinted at it.

“Are you sure?” He asked, continuing in his path. The customer who was requesting the flower seemed a bit uneasy with the exchange, but Taako was a determined elf. He knew what fucking lavender looked like, he wasn’t stupid.

“I’ve been doing this for a long time, Taako. The two do look a lot like each other, but that isn’t lavender.” Brigid snatched it from his hands and held it under his nose. “Smell. Does that smell like lavender?”

Taako sniffed and felt his shoulders sag. “Fuck.”

“You’ll get it- hey, you actually got yarrow instead of hemlock today!” Brigid said, heading back to the storage.

“But on that note-” Taako shot a dazzling smile at the now concerned customer before following Brigid. “Why the fuck do you have poisonous hemlock in your store?”

Brigid laughed, but didn’t respond. Maybe she secretly was a murder who wanted to kill Taako.

* * *

 

That night, Brigid poured herself and Taako a glass of wine. They had finished dinner, a nice garden salad, but neither of them wanted to go to bed yet.

This had become a ritual for the two, drunk wine and watch shitty tv, something fun for them to do every few days. Brigid would sprawl out on the couch, and Taako would cram himself in the space between the coffee table and couch. Brigid would make fun of the way Taako was sitting, and Taako would point out how before he came along, her best friends were plants, and then they would use that arguing energy for roasting whatever show they were watching. By the end of the night they would be a little tipsy (so far Brigid has only had one noise complaint, and that was when Taako had tried to drunkenly play Brigid’s drum set). Tonight’s show was Fantasy Bachelorette, and Taako found himself absentmindedly tugging at the base of his ring finger, where the finger meets his palm, just the place a ring would go-

“Alix likes you, ya know.” Brigid said, startling him out of his inner monologue.

“Yeah, I like her too. She smiles a lot, which is kind of weird, but she seems cool.” Taako responded, not quite following.

“No, like- she _likes_ you.” The meaning of it finally dawned on Taako, and he gasped.

“Oh fuck.” It was like a million little needles were pricking at his stomach. Just the thought of being with Alix was nearly disturbing, but as Taako thought about it, it wasn’t simply _Alix,_ it was girls.

Taako stared at Brigid, trying to imagine her in a sexual way. The concept in itself was kind of a shady thing to do, but Taako got what he needed.

“What does-“ Brigid started, but Taako interrupted by slamming his empty wine glass down.

“I’m gay.”

“Oh.” Brigid blinked, clearly surprised. “Oh, okay.”

“Yeah.”  Well, that's another thing to add to the book- Taako reached across the table and grabbed the journal. They always tried to keep it close at hand, with a pen.

_‘Taako is gay. Gaaaaaaay. Literally super gay’_ he wrote as Brigid continued to talk.

“Well, that’s cool. Literally the first time we met I told you the same thing, so I guess that this takes out the chance for an awkward cringe-worthy roommate romance.” Taako snorted and dated the note. “And Alix, she’s cool, but kind of weird. I think she really latched on to the fact that you don’t have any memories, which is shady as hell. If she hasn’t gotten the point in a few days I can just tell her to fuck off.”

He hummed, sliding the journal on the coffee table again. Brigid refilled his wine glass and raised her glass. “To lesbian and gay solidarity?”

Taako laughed but clinked his glass against hers.

“Suppose so.”

The night dragged on, and their wine bottle was soon emptied, but they got a new one. Every so often one of them would interject something about the show, but soon enough began talking. Taako knew that Brigid’s mom had opened the store and passed it on to Brigid. He knew that Brigid was allergic to shellfish, and that her favorite color was green. Taako didn’t have the same information to share, but Brigid’s words filled the space.

“I’m half-elf, did you know that?” Taako hummed in lieu of responding. “My mom was human; my dad was an elf. He bolted pretty quickly after I was born, and my mom never remarried.”

“You can never trust elven parents- especially fucking dads. They never stick around. Elven moms stick around for a bit longer, but I wouldn’t count on them for shit.” Taako said, sneering. The words left a bitter taste in his mouth. It was only when Brigid was silent for a beat too long did he look at her. Her eyes were wide, and Brigid’s eyebrows looked like they were about to shoot through the roof. “What?”

“You don’t have a good relationship with your parents?”

“Huh?”

“You just made a pretty shady comment about elven parents- I totally agree with the dad thing, but that seemed a bit deeply rooted.” Brigid said. She reached for the journal, and Taako watched her with wide eyes.

“Fuck, I guess. I don’t really know where that came from.”

“Well, it’s in the journal.” Brigid mumbled, closing the journal and sliding it back on the table.

Taako found himself tugging at the skin of his fingers again. Clearly, something in his subconscious still thought that something was there- like muscle memory, like he was twisting a ring. Taako bit his lip, thinking. He tried to stretch far, back, deep into his mind, but found nothing. So- he started a step one. Thinking of relationships. Start easy- he would be with a man, obviously. Maybe even a husband? Fuck- that seemed crazy.

_Who is someone who I would want to be with?_ Taako’s mind was blank, if anything a headache was starting to come on, and chills erupted on his skin. He was cold, and that was it.

“What are you thinking about?” Brigid asked. Taako rubbed his arms, frowning.

“I think I was married- am married? I might currently be married to someone.” Brigid was mid-sip of her drink when he said this, but she spit it out. Taako shrieked, although he was clear of the spray. Brigid didn’t react to that, instead letting her mouth hang open.

“What the fuck?”

“I don’t know! I keep fucking with the skin where a ring should be, and-” Taako paused as he remembered something that happened nearly two weeks ago. “ _Holy fucking shit,_ Brigid, the guy who robbed me, remember that?” Brigid nodded, finally reaching for some napkins and cleaning up her mess. “He stole some jewelry that I had, including a ring I had on my ring finger.”

“Holy fucking shit,” Brigid echoed. The two sat in silence, letting the revelation sink in. “That’s actually kind of sad,” Brigid remarked. “This means, your husband is out there, somewhere, probably worried sick, and we have no way of finding him.”

“Shit.” Taako sat back, leaning against the base of the couch. He then took a large swig of his wine, downing what was left of it. “That’s fucking heavy.” Brigid hummed, and finished her wine as well.

“I’ll write this down, you can go to bed.” Brigid turned off the TV, and looked at Taako. “What time does the store open?”

“When do the questions end?” Taako groaned, but complied. “Seven on weekdays, nine on weekends. Thank god you open- there is no way I could wake up so early.” Brigid beamed at him, and moved into the kitchen, out of sight. Taako stood up, sighing loudly as he stretched. As much as he liked sitting in the rather awkward position, it was shit for his back.

“‘Night Brigid!” Taako called as he headed to his room. Brigid echoed her goodbye back, her voice fading as Taako closed the door to his bedroom. Not much has changed in here, other than the fact that he has a few more clothes than before, and the bed isn’t made. It wasn’t nice, and Taako had yet to decide if he was home- especially now, especially now that he has realized that he might have a fucking _husband_ out there. Fucking weird.

Taako fell asleep that night distantly thinking of dark eyes and cold skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the comments on the last chapter made my heart SO HAPPY and im actually really proud of how this chapter came out even though it took me 50 years to write  
> i swear im not giving up on this yet!!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brigid awoke that night to a door slamming open, and a few seconds later, a clatter from the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a slightly shorter chapter but honestly one of my favorites out of the whole book (so far). things are happening babies!!!

Brigid awoke that night to a door slamming open, and a few seconds later, a clatter from the kitchen. On impulse, she scrambled out of bed and grabbed the baseball bat that rested next to her nightstand. If push came to shove and she needed to use magic, she could always sing. But baseball bats were more fun.

Her room was still dark, and the only light that was provided was coming from her window- the clock on her nightstand said it was one in the morning.

She slowly opened her door and crept out into the hallway, holding the baseball bat above her shoulder. Taako’s door was open; maybe it was his door who slammed open, but what if it was an intruder and he was hurt or worse? Trying to calm her fears, Brigid walked silently into the kitchen, scanning the apartment for any signs of intruders or-

There was a tall, lean figure in front of the stove; it was Taako. “Taako, what are you…” Brigid trailed off when Taako jumped, startled at the sound of her voice. She lowered her bat and took another step closer to him. “Taako?”

When the elf finally looked at her, there was a moment where he clearly didn’t recognize her. When he did, it was a slow click, and he stumbled towards her. “Brigid, I need your stone-” Taako sounded like he was still asleep, his voice was slurred.

“What?”

“I need you to call Kravitz, or _Lup,_ fuck, where is your fucking stone-” Taako was upon her, grasping her upper arms with a surprising amount of strength.

“ _Ow,_ Taako, slow down for a second-” The two were speaking on top of each other, but Taako soon gave up, and started searching through the drawers and cabinets.

“No, I need to call Kravitz, I need to talk to Lup, I need to get home, I need to- fuck!” Taako banged his hip against the counter corner and stumbled. Brigid was at his side in an instant, helping him back up. He shrugged her off and started to rush towards the front door. Brigid cursed under her breath and started to follow him.

“Taako, my stone is in my bedroom, let me grab it, just sit down.”

“No, fuck you, I have to get to Lup, I have to-” Taako stumbled again, but this time Brigid was caught too off guard to do anything about it. He hit the ground on his knees, causing Brigid to curse even more. She looped her arms around his and pulled him up.

Taako stood up slowly, and met her eyes, clearly confused. Brigid fought the urge to sigh. “Brigid? What-”

This has happened once or twice before, but never like this. Sometimes while working Taako would space out, only to come back moments later confused and dazed. He thankfully had never forgotten who Brigid was (she would have no idea how to handle that), but never remembered the episodes.

This was most certainly the strangest; Taako had never said names before, and they certainly have never been so coherent. Brigid helped Taako into a chair and went to get a glass of water. “Why are we awake? It’s like the middle of the night.” Brigid glanced at Taako over her shoulder.

“You tell me. You woke me up, rummaging around here. When I came in you were talking, telling me to call these people-”

“I said names?”

Brigid handed him the glass. “Yeah. Kravitz and Lup. You said you needed to talk to them, but you didn’t say much else. You wanted my stone so you could call them.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah. Do those names ring any bells?”

Taako paused and scrunched up his nose.

“No.”

“Shit.” Taako sighed, and ran his fingers through his hair, making it stick up. He took a sip of water and stood up.

“I’m just going to go back to bed.” Taako said. He nodded at Brigid and silently went back to his room. There clearly was a lot more going on in his mind, but she knew that Taako wouldn’t share anything until he was ready.

_This was so fucked up,_ Brigid thought to herself. Taking Taako’s still full glass, she put it into the sink. She then grabbed the journal- _bless the Gods that they managed to always have it close_ \- and scribbled down all of the new information.

They had two names- Lup, and Kravitz. Of course, they didn’t have the gender or identity for either of the names. As she was writing, something dawned on her. _Could one of these people be Taako’s husband?_ She wrote that down too, just for good measure.

After staring at the small notes that they have put together in the past two weeks for what felt like hours, Brigid gave up. She would have to open up shop in a few hours- might as well get some sleep now. Her and Taako could regroup in the morning.

* * *

 

In the morning, Brigid was surprised to see Taako was already up and about, making tea. He looked- frankly, Taako looked like shit. There were bags under his eyes, and Brigid wondered if he had been able to go back to sleep the night before.

“Do you remember what happened last night?” Brigid asked. Taako shrugged and passed her a mug of tea.

“A little bit. I just remember being really confused, and now I have a wicked bruise on my hip.” Taako lifted his t-shirt, pointing to the already blue and black spot that was forming. Brigid winced, and nodded.

“You took a bit of a hit, I think you knocked against the counter corner. You also made a break for the door, but your clumsiness prevented your escape.” She motioned to the journal. “I wrote down everything you said last night, but none of it really made sense. I hope that maybe something triggers a memory?”

Taako looked at the words, squinting. “These are weird names,” He commented, taking another long sip of tea.

“Says the elf called Taako,” Brigid shot back. Taako merely rolled his eyes and pushed the journal towards her.

“Ha. Funny. But no- I’m not getting anything.”

“Nothing? I would at least like to know the name of your husband.” Taako snorted.

“You and me both.” Suddenly, Taako pushed back his chair, and stood up. “FUCK!” He yelled, making Brigid jump. “I fucking hate this! I hate everything about this! I feel like I am so close! It’s right on the tip of my tongue, but I can’t fucking put it together!” Taako’s pitch was rising, he was just about screaming. Although it obviously wasn’t directed at Brigid, she slid out of the way, out of his view. "There might be people who are fucking out there, looking for me, and I can't do jack shit about it because I am out in Gods knows where, dumb as fuck!"

"Taako, you aren't dumb-" Brigid tried to interject, but Taako yelled right over her like she hadn't said anything.

"I might actually be someone important! People out there could care about me?"

"Okay, Taako, I care about you, I know-" Getting all of his anger out could help, but this self-deprecating rant seemed more harmful than not.

"I just-" Taako kicked the table in front of him. "Fuck!"

Knowing that she needed to get in between this, Brigid stepped out in front of Taako. She grabbed his hands, and gently squeezed. "Taako, breathe. We can figure it out, we now have more information than we have ever had before. Yes, this sucks, and yes, that is an understatement, but you aren't alone in this. I am with you, and I am going to help you figure out who you are, and help you get home."

Taako sat back down, rubbing his head. Brigid passed his tea back to him, and then grabbed the journal. "Step one should be figuring out what we can about these names. Clearly these people are important to you, but who are they exactly?" There was a beat of silence as Brigid thought.

“Did you want me to answer that question or-” Taako started. “Because I thought we clarified that I really don’t know.”

Brigid snorted, and Taako gave a weak smile. "Let's go on with the assumption that one of these people is your husband. Which one sounds more like a name of someone you would marry?"

That got Taako to laugh, and he shook his head. "I don't know!"

"Taako and Kravitz? Or Taako and Lup?" Brigid tried, but they both sounded unfamiliar to her, so she couldn't have much input on the matter.

"I kind of like the name Kravitz- it's sexy." Taako finally said. Then he scrunched up his nose. "Ew. What if it turns out Kravitz is like- my friend or something."

"Or worse, they could be your sibling." Brigid added, making Taako sneer even more.

"Ew."

"How about Lup? Does that name ring any bells?"

"It's a dope fucking name, but uh-" Taako thought for a few seconds and then shook his head. "Nothing. If I think too hard about this stuff, then my head begins to hurt."

"Aw shit, okay, we can take a break. I gotta get ready to open up the shop- do you want to come down and open with me? Or you can relax up here until it's your real time to start." Taako took one last sip of his tea and nodded.

"I'll just come down now. It's not like I have nothing better to do today." Taako handed Brigid his mug, who put it in the sink. She frowned when she did so, and turned back to Taako.

"We have to do dishes tonight." Her only response was Taako groaning, as he headed for the bathroom.

Later that day, when Taako thought he was alone, or that Brigid wasn't listening, she heard him mumbling the names to himself. At first, she was worried that he was going crazy, but then remembered Taako's little meltdown that morning. He was going to be a little crazy, who wouldn't be, in his situation?

But they had information now- clues to who Taako truly was. And this was solid evidence, not just stupid facts like, ' _Taako doesn't like pineapple by itself, but he loves pineapple on pizza_ '. They had names, names of people who Taako obviously cared about. That meant that they (most likely) cared about him, and they were looking for him (hopefully). Still, she felt a pang of guilt for not having her stone of farspeech with her, she could have helped him get a hold of whoever he needed to talk to, and they wouldn't still be in this predicament now.

_We have names now._ Brigid reminded herself as she watched Taako ring up a customer’s purchase. She then stepped in, reminding Taako that the pots were a part of a two for one sale, so he was currently overcharging the customer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all of your comments? have seriously been giving a will to live/write?? thank you so much!!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brigid paused, and looked at him curiously. “Do you really not know how magic works?”

"You know, in all of the time that I have known you, I have never seen you play an instrument." Taako commented from his position on the couch. He was currently completely sprawled out and watching Brigid water the plants. One day, a while ago, he had offered to help water all of the plants, but she apparently had a specific way of doing the job and refused to let him come near it. Although watching her do it right now, he had to admit that she had a point. Brigid would talk softly to the plants, even sing to them at times, and the plants seemed to flourish right then and there. It was calming, just to watch.

Brigid hummed softly. “I enjoy playing music, but I don’t often play for an audience. When magic is needed- sure, I will do what I can, but magic isn’t really needed around here.”

“Are there any plant spells? Something to make them grow faster?” Brigid shook her head and put down her watering can.

“I’m sure there are- I am not interested in them, though. My mom was a firm believer in growing plants with nothing but love and water- maybe some fertilizer too. No magic.” Taako hopped up from the couch, walking over to the lyre. It was rather bland- just wood with strings. Distantly, a voice in his head told him how much nicer it would look with carvings etched into it.

Brigid snatched the instrument from his hands, distracting Taako from his thoughts. “Be careful with that, it’s fragile.” He rolled his eyes and merely inspected the next thing- a piano. It was small and pushed against the wall. There was a thin layer of dust on the keys, but he still pressed down on a key.

“Shit- Taako, stop touching my instruments.” Brigid said as a note rang out, but Taako could tell that she was smiling. He stepped back anyway, only to knock into another unidentified instrument. It made a clang as it hit the ground, and Brigid cursed, rushing to go pick it up. Taako stepped out of the way, but still admired the impressive collection that she had gathered.

“When’s the last time you played?” Taako racked his brain for any instances of Brigid playing in the past few weeks, but nothing came up. Brigid looked at him, and back at the instruments.

“Last week, while you were sleeping. I played the piano- quietly, of course.” She seemed almost embarrassed by the fact, like she was a child who had just been caught with their hand in the cookie jar. Taako huffed a laugh as he watched her shift all the instruments around. To him it looked like they were all just cluttered together, but there clearly was some kind of method to her madness- Brigid knew what she was doing.

“Play something.” Taako requested. Brigid sighed again, but put down the lyre, this time picking up a mandolin, making Taako cheer. “Should I make popcorn?”

Taako felt like he had won a battle- sometimes things with the two were. Taako would pick out the wrong flowers, and Brigid would try to get him to get the right one, Brigid would make the same carrot-based meal for three days in a row and Taako would beg for mercy. But things worked out for them, they always did. The two clicked together well, but it left Taako to wonder if they would have been friends if he had all his memories.

“I think we are out of popcorn-“ Brigid remarked. She plucked at a few strings thoughtfully as Taako resumed his position on the couch. “We ate it all the other day during the Fantasy Bachelor Finale.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. Nadiya should have won.” Brigid rolled her eyes, having heard this rant many times before. “So, how does this work? Do you just play, and magic happens?”

Brigid paused, and looked at him curiously. “Do you really not know how magic works?”

“Not for bards, but I know a few basics. In theory.” Taako added hastily. “I probably am not a wizard, or any shit like that.” Brigid hummed, but looked down at her instrument. Her eyes slowly shut, and she started to play.

Taako’s suspicions were right- _Brigid was fucking awesome._ The music was one of the most beautiful things Taako had ever heard in his short memory, although it did tug at his brain, push it against a wall, as if trying to draw a connection to something Taako no longer knew. So, he ignored that and allowed himself to get lost in the song. Before long, Brigid started murmuring, and magic happened.

Taako watched with wonder as sparkling lights appeared above them, seeming to replace the ceiling. It looked like they were in the stars- it was gorgeous.

“Oh,” Taako let slip out, awed. Brigid was fully lost in the song- the notes were perfect, and her murmuring became singing. Her words were slow, and drawn out, like this was a ballad, but the language was not one that Taako knew. It sounded old language, one lost to time.

The lights above them twinkled, though Taako doubted that Brigid noticed. Her eyes were still closed shut, and now she was slightly swaying to the music. How the fuck was she able to make such beautiful music with a little tiny box with strings? He couldn’t figure out where to look, and instead settled on looking up at the lights, and down at the half elf playing in front of him.

All too soon, the lights above them faded, and Brigid played the last twangy notes of her song. She exhaled softly opening her eyes. _She looked nervous,_ Taako realized before jumping onto his feet, clapping.

“Bravo!” Taako shouted, laughing as Brigid beamed.

“Thank you,” Brigid bowed. “I haven’t played the mandolin in a while, I hope that it wasn’t too out of tune.”

Taako rolled his eyes, sitting back down.

“Sure, play the modesty card. Brigid, that was amazing.” Brigid mirrored Taako, rolling her eyes back at him, and put down the mandolin. “Seriously- did you even see what happened to the fucking ceiling?”

“It was just an illusion spell- do you really not know anything about magic?” Taako shook his head. Brigid looked at him, and then back at her collection. “What about music?” Taako groaned and threw his arm over his eyes melodramatically.

“Please don’t make any shitty metaphors about how music and magic are similar, I don’t want to hear it-“

“No, I was going to tell you to try it. Try and play something.”

That got Taako’s attention. He sat up, looking at her curiously. Brigid stepped aside, giving him a full view of all the instruments that she had. He felt uneasy momentarily.

“Are you sure?”

“Why not?” He only hesitated for a moment more before jumping out. “Maybe try out the piano- that would be the hardest for you to break.” Brigid cut in behind him. Taako faced her and rolled his eyes so hard that it hurt. He moved to the piano anyway, instantly slamming his fingers down. A shrill, awful sounding noise came out, making the two flinch. “Oh gods- okay. Uh- do this.” Brigid stepped next to him and hit one key at a time, making a simple tune come out. Taako copied her on the opposite side of the piano.

After a few minutes of Taako copying Brigid, she took her hands away from the piano. “Not bad.” Brigid inspected Taako, before shrugging. “Not good by any means, but not bad. I think we can say for sure that you do not know how to play the piano.” Taako snorted, but stepped away from the piano, making sure to not knock into anything this time.

“How do you do that?” Taako asked. Brigid looked up at him, confused.

“Do what?” Taako gestured with his hand.

“Magic. That cool shit.” Brigid paused, and hummed thoughtfully.

“It just happens, I guess. When I focus on a spell in my mind and do something musical, I can just make it happen. It just takes focus, but it’s in my blood, you know?” Taako wandered back to the couch as she spoke. “My mom taught me magic, but I also learned a lot in school. Do you really not remember anything about magic?”

Taako shrugged. “Not sure if I’m feeling that whole ‘the magic is within you’ if that is what you are asking.”

Brigid hummed, then walked out of the room. As she disappeared into the hall, Taako sat back up again. _That was rude,_ he thought only moments before she came back, holding the wimpiest wand he had ever seen. It was made up of gnarled wood, and not the cute kind, it looked like it belonged to a five-year-old who likes to bite things.

"What is that?" Brigid smiled, and held it out towards him.

"An old wand. I've only used it once and realized how much better I like being a bard. But maybe you could try it, see if you like it." Taako sighed, but still reached out for it.

It felt uncomfortable in his palm, the groves etched into it were not made to fit his slender elven hands.

"Just focus. You can start off with something easy, something just to see if you are capable of casting something, try mage hand."

Taako looked dumbly at the wand in his hands. Brigid shuffled closer to him and sat down next to him on the couch. "The magic is already in you- the wand is just a means of getting it out and making something happen. Just focus- and picture a hand in your mind. It's a spectral hand."

Taako closed his eyes- that is something that wizards did, right?- and focused. If he thought hard enough, he could almost picture magic coursing through his blood, so he tried to focus through his veins, to his fingers, into the wand and out-

A brilliant bright light filled the room, forcing Taako's eyes open. There was light everywhere, he couldn't even see Brigid next to him, but that was when his hands started to burn.

Distantly he heard Brigid let out a surprised yell, but it felt like his hands were on fire, he didn't know what to do, everything was too bright, and-

Taako opened his hand to drop the wand but instead the wand exploded in his hand, the pieces flying everywhere. Taako shouted out in pain and he knew that if he could see his hand, there would be blood everywhere. Even without the wand, the bright light continued. He could hardly see through it, it was like the literal sun was in the living room-

And then it was over. The light slowly faded out. Taako could hear Brigid making pained gasps beside him, but he couldn't tear his eyes away from his hands. He was right, they were torn up, and multiple cuts were already starting to bleed. They looked like he had stuck them directly into a fire, and _shit,_ they _hurt_.

"Taako?" Brigid asked meekly from beside him. He could hear the tremor in her voice but also heard how she was trying to steady it, make it seem like that she wasn't hurt.

_Goddamnit._ Not only had Taako managed to fuck up his hands, he also managed to hurt his only friend. Fuck. "Taako, what the hell. That was like an 8th level spell, you cast Sunburst, I haven't seen that since-" Her voice got choked up, but she still reached out for Taako. Taako jerked away from her touch the moment her fingers touched his shoulder. "You're hurt, here-"

"No. Fuck this." Taako said, standing up. "I'm going out."

"What? Where?"

"Out."

"Taako, we need to talk about this- that was an insanely powerful spell, the wand literally couldn't even handle it."

"No. Fuck this." He repeated. Still not looking at her, he walked over to the door and grabbed his coat. "I can't fucking remember anything, and now I am supposed to just accept that I am a fucking eight level wizard? Or maybe even higher? What the shit?" He grabbed the doorknob too harshly, wincing as pain shot up through his arm again. "I'm going out."

And with that, Taako slipped out of the room, and went down the stairs. Part of him expected Brigid to follow him, so he rushed but by the time that he was at the base of the stairs and the door hadn't opened yet, his head hurt just as much as his hands.

_This shit was getting real old,_ Taako thought as he opened the door, letting himself out onto the street.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the absolute chaotic energy of me posting this at exactly 2:51 am is. good.   
> also sorry for the delayed post, i meant to post earlier this week and then obviously everything in my life went wrong lololol
> 
> tell me something you like about the chapter or just the book in general i need some of that sweet sweet love and validation that i can always rely on you guys for 
> 
> and. i just love you guys a lot i really hope you know that


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every moment now was a tense moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah. hi. im back.

Kravitz was used to the house being full- whether it was full with the Birds, or some of their various friends, Taako certainly knew how to throw a good party. After a while, Kravitz grew accustomed to more than Angus and Taako being in the house.

But he always had Taako there with him, Taako was always there, directing most of the conversation, distracting everyone from the occasional awkward or tense moments.

Every moment now was a tense moment.

Kravitz had long given up on sleep- he was dead for God’s sake, he didn’t need it. Most of his days were spent pouring over maps, making tea that was more whiskey than actual herbs, and trying to keep everyone from tearing each other apart.

Tensions between him and Lup were high- frankly, Kravitz was tired of the ‘fighting without words’ thing that they were in, but Lup refused to back down. He could only hope that when their fight did eventually become verbal that Angus was in a different room.

Angus. The boy had been putting in more work than nearly anyone else. The first week of Taako being gone he had put on a brave face, working hard to try and find him. Then, one night, he had crawled into Kravitz’s lap while Kravitz was reading a book about memory loss.

_“What if we can’t find him?” Angus had whimpered, but Kravitz heard the unspoken fear behind his words. What if I can’t find him?_

_Kravitz put the book down and hugged Angus tightly to his chest._

_“We will find him. I promise.”_

That had been days ago- maybe weeks, _fuck._ Kravitz had given up on trying to keep track of the days- if he really wanted to know how many days it’s been since he has held the love of his life in his arms, Kravitz could just ask one of the others.

At some point, without asking, four new people were living in his house. Lup and Barry had already installed themselves into the guest bedroom, but Magnus was currently sleeping on the floor of Angus’ room, while Merle and Davenport were in Kravitz and Taako’s unused bed. Lucretia was sleeping on the couch in the living room. Not that any of them slept very often- Magnus was usually the first of them to turn in at night, Kravitz suspected he hoped that the others would follow his lead. Merle, Davenport and Lucretia were trying to work on something to help Taako’s memory, something to restore it permanently.

 _But we’d have to find the bastard, first._ Kravitz mused to himself. He was sitting out on the porch as the sun rose, having a moment to himself. Angus was asleep in his room, finally, the boy needed some sleep. Apparently he was on to something, but he refused to let anyone in on this lead. It was yet only another thing that Kravitz felt unprepared in the face of without Taako by his side.

A creak startled Kravitz out of his thoughts.

“Sorry,” Magnus spoke when Kravitz jumped. “Didn’t mean to startle you.” He settled down into rocking chair next to Kravitz and looked at him thoughtfully. “How are you doing?” Kravitz shrugged. "Sorry. Stupid question."

Kravitz wasn't sure that he could put how he felt into words, even if he wanted to. How could he tell Magnus that two nights ago, he had stumbled into the kitchen where Lup was making a midnight cup of coffee, and for a split second, he thought that she was Taako? Even though her hair is shorter, and dyed red, she still looks like Taako. They are identical twins, for fucks sake.

But that moment of his heart leaping into his throat, where it felt like he had been punched in the stomach was nothing in comparison to when Lup's eyes met his, and they were colder, harsher, and so definitely not Taako's. Kravitz had whirled around on his heel and went back to his office. Him and Lup had yet to discuss that, but he knew that Lup knew what was happening in his mind.

Kravitz and Lup weren't talking. Frankly, he tried to stay out of her way. He knew that she was angry at him, that she blamed all of this on him (which was entirely justified), but now all he could do was wait until she blew up on him. Hopefully she had the decency to do it when Angus wasn't around, all of this was hard enough on him. The last thing that the boy needed was to see his adoptive father and his aunt have a screaming match.

"I think Ango has a lead." Magnus continued to talk. "Something about train stations, I don't really know. He wants to wait until he is sure about it until telling us, which I told him that he was pretty much always right." Kravitz closed his eyes, still facing out. He let himself fall into a trance, listening to Magnus talk, and rocking back and forth in the chair. Magnus continued to talk, telling stories about dogs- or something like that, Kravitz wasn't paying full attention. He was eternally grateful for this- Magnus wasn't going to try to get him to talk or do any of that shit. For the first time in a while, Kravitz relaxed, listening to his friend's voice.

He had drifted off into sleep before he knew it but jerked awake when the door slammed open. Kravitz's eyes flew open, and his hands stuttered along the arm rests of the chair as he tried to gather his surroundings.

It was no longer night, but now morning, the sun was out and distantly he heard birds chirping.

"We need to go." That was Angus, making Kravitz turn to him, startled. Magnus was still in the chair next to Kravitz, but looked wide awake.

"What?"

"It's Taako, I know where he went." Any tiredness that Kravitz felt before was gone, and Kravitz was on his feet. As he strode into the house, he could hear Magnus asking for more details but Kravitz couldn't care. He grabbed his stone, and a little pouch of coins. There were other things that he could grab but not now, not when there was an actual lead-

"Kravitz?" Kravitz looked up, having been so focused that he didn't even notice Lup and Barry who were sitting at the dinner table, both with mugs. "You going somewhere?"

Thankfully, Kravitz was saved from answering when Magnus barged back into the house, Angus trailing behind him.

“Angus has tracked Taako through the train station- he thinks that Taako went to a town called Eastbourne.” Kravitz didn’t need much, and if he forgot something that he needed, creating a rift back home would only take moments. Lup seemed to be on the same page, already on her feet and grabbing a cloak.

“Wait- wait, what?” Barry sputtered, trying to get ahold of everything.

“I will just create a rift there, maybe we can talk to the militia there,” Kravitz spoke over Barry. Magnus slipped out of the room, presumably to tell the others the new information. “And if not, maybe the locals have seen something.”

“Or we could go to the train station, maybe if we track Taako’s footsteps directly, they will lead us to him.” Barry interjected. He looked frazzled (and tired, but Gods, they were all tired) but was putting his and Lup’s mugs in the sink. At some point, Angus had slipped his hand into Kravitz’s, and was clutching onto it. Kravitz paused, considering the idea.

“It would take us longer, sir, but that might be the most beneficial to my investigation.” Angus piped in as Lucretia followed Magnus into the room, rubbing her eyes tiredly. “And we don’t know with entire certainty that Taako _did_ go to Eastbourne. It’s only the most likely choice. There is a ninety-six percent chance that he went there via train.”

 _Eastbourne._ Kravitz had been there a few times, on business matters. It’s not the cleanest town, and if Taako has lost his memories then got stuck in Eastbourne, that doesn’t look great.

“I don’t give a fucking shit if we get there on a fucking unicorn-“ Kravitz has yet to know anyone else- besides Taako- who cursed so fluidly in the morning than Lup. “-we just need to get to Eastbourne. Like, yesterday.”

“Merle, Davenport and I are working on a cure. And we can provide support from home base.” Lucretia offered, sending a warm smile towards Angus. “Good job, Angus.”

“So, it’s decided then. Let’s go to the train station.” Magnus said.

“Just- let me get out of my PJ’s.” Barry said, rushing to their guest bedroom. Kravitz watched him go, pausing when he noticed-

“Yes. He has jeans that he sleeps in.” Lup had noticed Kravitz’s staring and cut into his thoughts. He smiled crookedly at her, and Lup smiled back. That was probably one of the most civil moments that they have had since this whole ordeal had started.

Then Magnus dumped a few pocket knives on the table. “Is there a security on the train? Will anyone take away these?” he said, at the same time that Lup said “For Pan’s _sake_ , Mags, don’t just dump knives on the fucking table like that-”. Barry ambled back downstairs as Magnus and Lup has dissolved into an argument: “What if Angus just decided to reach out and grab one? Then we would have a baby holding a fucking knife, and who’s fault would that be?”

Angus blinked, clearly not expecting to be brought into this. “Uh- ma’am, I wouldn’t just-“ Lup waved her hand, already dismissing Angus. Kravitz stepped in then, pushing Angus ever-so-slightly behind him.

“Maybe we should just get going. Magnus, please restrain yourself from taking multiple knives, I doubt that we will need them on the train.” Kravitz waved a hand, before sighing. “Come on. I will make a rift to get us to the train station. Eastbourne is a bit of a journey away.” Angus darted out of the room next, coming back minutes later holding his satchel. It was only then that it occurred to Kravitz that he should maybe tell Angus to stay home, but the boy had done what seven adults had failed to do with their combined minds and powers. When he slipped his hand back into Kravitz’s, the elder simply smiled down on him.

Angus, who was clearly putting on a brave face, smiled back. That was the best that any of them could do at this point.

* * *

 

Maybe actually _going_ on the train wasn’t the best idea. The Grim Reaper found himself antsy, and anxious to get to Eastbourne. They didn’t really know where they were going to go from there, but Angus had said something about talking to the train station management.

Currently, Angus was leaning against Kravitz, fast asleep. Lup, Barry and Magnus were in the sleeper car next to the one that Angus and Kravitz resides in currently.

The trip was reaching its end, but it had been nearly a two-day journey. Two days with nothing to do, two days of being stuck on a fucking train.

It did make sense, though. If Taako has been on a train on a path similar to this one, his stone of farspeech wouldn’t have been able to connect to anything.

Angus shifted in his sleep, burrowing further into Kravitz’s side. Kravitz waited until the boy’s breathing slowed down again before closing his eyes.

“Raven Queen, my savior, my leader.” Kravitz began. “I beg that you guide me in this time. Taako is lost- but he is not the only one. _I_ am lost, my queen. I do not know where to go, or what to do. I do not know how to help those closest to me.” His voice caught in his throat, so he paused. When he did, Kravitz felt the Raven Queen’s presence in his mind.

The weight of everything that had been happening felt slightly lighter. He knew that she was on his side here and was doing what she could to help.

Kravitz mumbled his thanks under his breath and resumed staring out the window. All that was outside was rocks, but he could see in the distance the bright beams of daylight through the tunnel. _We are coming, Taako,_ he thought to himself.

* * *

 

“What the fuck do you mean, you can’t disclose that kind of information?” Lup demanded, leaning over the counter. The worker sitting behind it cowered, but to his credit, Kravitz wouldn’t want his worst enemy to be on the receiving end of her tirade. “Do you know who the fuck I am? Who my husband is? Who literally anyone in this group is? I think we are entitled to any information that you have, and you know what? If you are so keen to keep that information to yourself, you can really just go stick it up-“

“Oh-kay,” Magnus interjected, sending a look at Lup as he pushed in front of her. “What my friend here is trying to say, is that we really need access to your databases.”

The worker smiled nervously. “I’ll- uh- have to go speak to my manager.” Magnus beamed right back.

“Please.” When the worker scurried off to the back room, he turned to face them. “He’s not going to give us anything. Chances are he’s back there right now not talking to his manager but talking to security.” Lup tried to push forward again, but Magnus held her back once again. “Nope. We should probably get out of here.”

“We’re the fucking seven birds, they can’t do jackshit to us-”

“They only know the stories. It is not going to do us any good to go out announcing what we have done, especially right now. Staying low is the best for us right now, and the best for Taako. Lup-” Magnus’s tone turned warning, although they all knew that he would never actually do something to her. “Let’s just go.”

Lup, still holding her head high, staring at him for a few moments, but when Magnus held her look with a steady gaze, she swiveled on one heel and walked out of the train station. After another moment, the others followed her, Magnus lingering behind the most to make sure they all were walking out.

“Thanks,” Kravitz mumbled as he passed the warrior. Magnus smiled at him, and nodded, but said nothing else.

As they walked out of the station, night had come. The street-lanterns were on, but they only cast dim lighting on the sidewalks. Everyone fell into line, with Kravitz walking alone at the front, but with Lup (and in addition, Barry) hot on his heels. Magnus had mumbled something about making arrangements at a local inn, somewhere they can stay for the night-

“Hey! Babe!” Kravitz, on instinct, slowed down, causing Lup to charge right into him. When Kravitz paused to look for whoever called out, but Lup grabbed his arm and forced him along.

“Catcallers, I know that tone of voice. Don’t pay them any attention, let’s just _go-_ ”

“No, babe! What happened to your girlfriend? Decided to back for more? My offer still stands!” The voice was getting closer, and it clearly was a man. “You cut your hair, but don’t worry- I can recognize that beautiful elf face anywhere!”

That made the whole group stop in their tracks. The man stumbled over, his eyes set on Lup. He looked like he had been drinking a bit too much ale- Kravitz felt the phantom hilt of his scythe materializing in his hand.

“Have we met?” Her voice was cold, but the man didn’t seem to get the memo.

“‘Course we did. Few weeks back? Out in front of Muggsy’s, right before that flower fucker came and took you away-”

“Are you sure that it was me that you saw?”

“Hell yeah! Well, with longer hair, but babe, I’m digging the pixie cut too-”

“Okay, yeah, that’s enough,” Barry cut in as the man took another step towards the group. “Why don’t you just go on back home, buddy.” The man squinted at Barry, but with a huff, turned away. They all watched him in silence as he walked away, and disappeared around the corner.

Kravitz was the first to break the silence.

“We should get to the inn, I got us a few rooms for the night, and we can-”

Kravitz’s words were cut off by a swift hit to the chest, although it did nothing to move him. He blinked at Lup, startled.

Lup was breathing heavily, her eyes rimmed red, but instead of looking sad, she looked _furious_. Her palm that had hit his chest was open, but Kravitz could see that her other hand was twitching with either rage, or worse, magic. “ _Don’t._ ” Lup hissed. “Don’t fucking _talk_ about what we should do next. I am _sick_ and _tired_ of listening to your plans about how you are going to get Taako back because you know what?” Kravitz willed himself to remain passive, and unmoving. _Lup is just angry, she doesn’t mean any of this-_ “If you actually knew Taako, he wouldn’t have vanished, he wouldn’t be gone at all. None of us would even fucking be here, because we would be at home! With Taako!”

“Hey, no, there’s no need for-” Magnus started from his position somewhere behind Lup, but Lup continued as if no one else had spoken.

“You didn’t work up on the moon with him, like Magnus and Merle! Hell, you fought against him! You didn’t spend a full fucking century with him, not like any of us- you didn’t fucking live by him, starve by him, watch him grow up-”

“Lup, back off, you-” Magnus pushed forward, seemingly wanting to get in between the two.

“Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Burnsides.” Lup hissed, never taking her angry gaze off of Kravitz.

Even if he would have been able to get a word in edgewise, Kravitz doesn’t know what he would have said. Luckily, Lup had enough words for the both of him.

“You didn’t tell anyone else about his memory problems- hell, you probably wouldn’t have even told me if I hadn’t witnessed firsthand!”

“Okay, that’s bullshit. That was all Taako’s doing, he refused to let me seek help-”

“You shouldn’t have listened to him! If you really knew Taako, you would know that he refuses to get help! For anything! Ever! You should have just taken this into your own hands!” Kravitz briefly wondered if she could hear the words that she was saying.

“Lup, you don’t really mean-” Angus at some point had managed to get in between the two although Lup was continuing to rapidly advance on Kravitz. Angus had a death grip on Kravitz’s arm, and if the way that his side was shuddering was any indication, he was crying.

“Why are you even here, Kravitz? Why couldn’t you get the fucking gods to help you?”

Lup had gotten right up in his face, but Kravitz held her gaze, refusing to look away.

 _Taako, Taako, Taako,_ he chanted in his head. That was the only reason that he hadn’t snapped back. Lup was just worried, she was frustrated, they all were. The sooner that they got Taako back, the better.

Lup was still ranting at him, _screaming_ about how he didn’t truly love or know Taako, about how this was _his_ fault. Angus was trying to speak up, and maybe Magnus or Barry were too, but Kravitz couldn’t hear anything over the roar of his heartbeat and Lup screaming at him. Lup, who to some was a mirror image of Taako, but to Kravitz, could not be any more different.

An arm wrapped around Lup’s waist, dragging her away. Angus flipped around and pressed his face into Kravitz’s stomach, clearly sobbing. Kravitz wrapped his arms around the boy, watching as Barry pulled Lup away as she threw verbal curses at him. He wouldn’t let himself flinch at her threats, because they were just that. But even if she did cast a spell against him, he deserved it, right?

Kravitz stood unmoving as Barry grabbed his wife by the hand and took her down the street, and around the corner. He did, however, flinch when Magnus dropped a heavy hand on his shoulder.

“Come on. Let’s get to the inn.” He said softly, so Kravitz nodded mutely and ran a hand through Angus’ tangled mess of curls. He couldn’t resist but to pick the boy up, hoisting him on his hip and turning to follow Magnus. Angus buried his head into the crook of Kravitz’s neck, and he was too old for this but _damn it,_ he needed it, and so did Kravitz.

They followed Magnus down the street, the odd trio remaining silent for the rest of the night. Kravitz pretended not to notice when Magnus tried to discreetly ask for an extra room, just as Magnus pretended not to hear the apologies that Kravitz was whispering to Angus.

They both pretended not to notice when Barry and Lup found their room, which were right next door to Magnus and Kravitz’s, and they both pretended to be asleep when the two began to fight in not-so-hushed whispers.

Kravitz pretended that Taako was just in the bathroom, getting ready for bed, and that he’d come in any second now. That was a nice thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wont bore you with excuses about my unexpected hiatus, but just know. i was not expecting to leave for so long, and i definitely did not intend to leave you guys hanging. for those of you who stayed, thank you. this means a lot to me. leave me a comment telling me what you thought of the chapter annnd how you were introduced to the mcel-boys + dad! 
> 
> thank you, seriously. i love this story, and i love you guys.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taako was at a bar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw for (mostly) vague sexual assault (they mostly just talk about it, everything is super vague) BUT it does exist in this chapter so be safe.

Taako was at a bar. Due to recent unfortunate memory loss, he had no idea what he liked to drink (other than wine), so trying it all seemed like a good place to start.

It was late on a Tuesday night, and a few other bar patrons sat further down at the bar or were hanging out by the jukebox. Taako himself sat as far away as possible as everyone else, which might have made the bartender miserable because he had to walk extra far to refill Taako’s drink every two minutes. Turns out that Taako likes most things, but especially the more high-end, fancy margaritas. It also turned out that Taako forgot to grab any money when he made his dramatic exit from Brigid’s place, so he continued to put things on a tab that technically didn't exist, and he may have to fake his own death to get out of.

That idea may be worth something, if it meant that he never had to face Brigid again.

The bartender, an orc, looked at him uneasily. It was only then that Taako realized that he was clutching the glass in his hand with all his strength, his knuckles turning white. Taako forced himself to breathe, relaxing his hold on the glass. As he did so, the burns on his hands sent another flash of pain up through his arms, reminding him of the events that led Taako to this bar. Wincing, Taako flexed his hands, trying to see how much he could move them without being in utter pain. Before he had come here, he had wiped the blood from his hands, but without bandages they continued to bleed. He then threw his drink back and finished it off, signaling the bartender for another.

Before the bartender could come over, someone quite rudely sat in the bar stool next to Taako's. Taako was sitting at the far end of the bar, there was a plentiful amount of seats that this man could have chosen to sit in, but no, this motherfucker went out of his way to sit next to Taako because that is the kind of day that Taako has been having. Taako was already mid-sneer and turning around to the intruder when the person spoke.

"Next drinks on me, okay?" That gave reason for pause, so Taako looked at the intruder (but who was now paying for drinks, so a welcome intruder). He was a human, with dark hair that seriously needed a wash. Or a brush. Or maybe just a shave, some things were past salvaging and honestly? Admitting that your hair is disgustingly bad is always the first step.

The bartender looked at Taako for confirmation, and Taako waved his hand, not finding it in himself to care. "Make it something... Blue," Taako decided. "And fancy." The bartender nodded and mumbled a few words under his breath. Not like magic- with magic, a sparkly blue drink appeared in the glass with a fog-like substance bubbling over the sides. Taako happily took it, taking a first dainty sip before shooting half of it down in one go. The bartender wandered off, having seen Taako do it before, but the man next to him gave a low whistle. The sound of it gave Taako chills on his spine, but that may have also been just the drink.

“Rough day?” Taako snorted.

“Rough month.” The man took that as an invitation, and moved closer, leaning into Taako.

“Oh yeah?” Instinct screamed at Taako to move away, so he did, only to find himself that he was completely trapped between the man, and the wall. Oh well.

Taako sneered in the man’s face, shoving him back into his seat.

“Yeah.” Taako took another not-so-dainty sip, refusing to break eye contact with the man. Something felt slimy, something felt off, there was a pit in his stomach that felt strangely familiar, so Taako _stayed,_ because this was wrong, everything in him was screaming that he wouldn’t be safe with this man, but fuck it. He was an 8th level wizard, maybe even higher. He could handle himself.

So, Taako stayed. Taako stayed and let the man- who’s name he learned to be _Paul_ \- buy him more drinks. They talked about meaningless things, most of which Taako didn’t fully understand, but he made sure to dance around his own past. That would have been a bit of a mood killer, wouldn’t it be? Regardless, by the end of the night, Paul was clearly interested, and down to fuck, and fuck it, so was Taako.

But by the time that Paul had stopped paying for drinks and turned to Taako with that terrible line- something about _getting out of here_ \- and Taako realized how much he _didn’t_ want to do that.

Because Paul had grabbed Taako’s wrist without warning, and the warning bells in Taako’s head were so loud that he couldn’t hear his own thoughts because _no one_ could touch him like that.

Taako didn’t want to do that because there was a name that were blaring in Taako’s mind, just out of reach. As Paul gripped Taako’s wrist tighter, Taako realized that his eyes were the same as someone that he knew, someone he knew long ago. He wrinkled his brow, trying to figure out who-

_Sazed._

Taako gasped, twisting his arm out of Sazed- fuck, Paul’s grasp. It wasn’t Sazed, but oh Gods-

“What the fuck?” Paul hissed, reaching to grab Taako’s arm. Taako moved to back away, only to hit his back against the wall. “Bitch, I’ll-” His eyes were fire, he wasn’t Sazed but oh Gods, his eyes were the same, the way he touched his skin was the same, oh Gods-

“You’ll what?”

Brigid’s voice jerked Taako out of his panic, a guiding light. He shoved past Paul and found Brigid standing there and looking frankly pissed. Her face softened a bit when she looked at Taako, but the second that Paul was back in her line of sight, she pushed towards him, sticking her pointer finger on his chest. “No, say it. I’d like to know what you were going to do to my friend.”

Paul scoffed, opening his mouth to say more when the bartender finally ( _finally_ ) intervened.

“Hey. You. Stop bugging these two.” He said from across the bar, his muscles flexing as he wiped down the bar top. Paul’s eyes widened and scattered. He was gone in an instance, but the bartender paid no mind to him, but instead directed his glance towards the remaining two. “And I would suggest you both leaving, too.”

The few bar patrons paid Brigid and Taako no mind as they hustled out of the bar. Paul, thankfully, was nowhere in sight, but that didn’t stop Taako from looking behind him every two minutes to make sure they weren’t being followed on their way home.

_Sazed, Sazed, Sazed,_ he chanted in his mind. No, he didn't remember much. But he remembered a sleaze bag named Sazed, and the warning bells that rang in his mind at the thought of him to let Taako know that this guy was a douche. There was a thread in his mind, one that started with Sazed and led to betrayal, but it was all so frayed that Taako couldn’t follow it. But what he did know was that Sazed hurt him, but that Sazed was also gone.

Brigid pinched his arm, drawing him out of his thoughts. “What was that all about?”

Taako shrugged. “He was buying me drinks. I then realized how bad his hair is.” The joke was good, he thought, but Brigid’s face remained serious.

“No. I mean, you fucking ran off. Five hours later, I finally find you being cornered in some shady bar by some shady looking guy. You looked like you had seen a ghost- _what happened_?”

“Can we just get back home?” The desperation in his voice must have been clear, because Brigid dropped both the subject and her grip on his arm. They walked the rest of the way in silence.

Once they made it back, Brigid went straight into the kitchen, saying something about making tea, but Taako remained in the doorway, staring at the living room.

The coffee table had been moved to an awkward angle, and all of the pillows had been knocked off of the couch. The only other sign that something had happened was the knocked over watering can, but the carpet had long since absorbed the liquid, and all that was left was a darker stain.

Guilt coursed through Taako, and he wondered if he had accidentally hurt Brigid. He could hear her working in the kitchen though, so he went into the living room, doing what he could to put the place back to normal. Readjust the coffee table. Pick the watering can up, although there wasn’t much he could do for the water, it was just water. It would be fine.

Brigid joined him minutes later, handing him a mug of tea. She took her own and sat down on the opposite side of the couch, looking right at Taako. “Explain.”

“I remembered-” Brigid gasped loudly, cutting him off, but Taako charged ahead. “Not everything. Not much, actually. Just a person-”

“Holy _fuck_ , please tell me you remember whoever your husband is-” Brigid, this time, shut herself up when Taako sent a glare in her direction.

“No. I don’t think so. I hope not- look, his name is- was, Sazed.” Saying the name out loud caused goosebumps to rise on Taako’s arms, but he ignored them and charged ahead. “I don’t remember much- nothing specific, but just a feeling of betrayal. I think he was creepy, having Paul grab me triggered the memory.”

“Do you think Sazed ever…” Brigid trailed off, her voice hushed. Taako shrugged.

“I can’t say for certain, but the way that I instinctively reacted, I’d say so. His, his eyes were the same, you know? They had the same intent, if that makes sense.”

Brigid sucked in a breath. “Fuck.”

Taako nodded solemnly. “I’d say so.”

They fell into a silence of sorts, Brigid only getting up to put her mug away and to light a candle. She hummed a little tune and Taako pretended not to notice when the splotch on the carpet magically evaporated.

The window was open, so they listened to the wind move through the trees outside as the night continued.

“Do you remember the Hunger?” Brigid asked suddenly. When Taako glanced at her, she wasn’t looking at him, nor the tv, but staring past the leafy plants and out the window. Taako frowned and stared into his half-empty mug of tea.

He stretched, far, and deep into his memory, but all that it brought was the beginnings of a migraine, and a ringing noise in his ears, so he stopped.

“No.”

Brigid exhaled through her mouth, long and hard, almost like she was frustrated.

“Maybe that’s a good thing. When it came, my mom grabbed my hand and pulled. She took me to the shop and locked the door- this was only a few years ago, but I was still too young to understand what was happening. My mom told me to hide in the backroom, kissed my head, and ran outside. The last time I saw my mother was when she rushed out to help those who had fallen outside, before invisible-” Brigid paused, and seemed to regain her composure. “These invisible _things_ overtook her. It was terrible.”

“Maybe I don’t want to remember it then. I rather not remember losing something than lose it but keep the memory.”  

Brigid looked at him sadly, and Taako tried to remember how they came to this topic. A bit too touchy-feely emotions for Taako, yessiree, Taako’s good out here (the insistent wriggling in his mind starts up again. There’s something he’s not remembering). “But the pain would still be there, I think. You may not remember it, but it’s still all there. You didn’t become void of emotions, I know that.”

“I don’t even want to think about what I lost- maybe the faster I move, the less I think about it, the better I am.”

“But you want to remember, don’t you? Who you wer- who you are?” Despite her slip up, Brigid was no longer looking forlornly out the window, but was staring right at Taako.

He found himself floundering for an answer.

“I- I have been here for a while, Brigid. If no one has come looking for me now, how will they find me now? Has someone even been looking?” Now it was Taako’s turn to look away.

“Someone out there must be.” Brigid sounded incredibly saddened at the thought, but Taako couldn’t bring himself to care.

It felt like one by one, after the last twenty-four hours that he had experienced, Taako was putting his walls up. Locking himself in and throwing away the key. Close the gates, throw away the hope.

“You remembered something, and we are learning more every single day-” Brigid was continuing, but Taako was now just ignoring her. He stood up abruptly, the tea nearly sloshing over the sides of the mug.

“You know what? I’m super tired. Nighty night, Brigid. Sorry for kinda fucking up everything. Goodnight.” Taako left Brigid to her choked off protests, hurrying into his room and closing the door behind him. As he leaned his back against the door, Taako looked at his room. It wasn’t even his room- it was a place that he slept. There was nothing in here, hardly any clothes other than the plain clothes that Brigid had helped him get during his first week here. But the walls were bare, Brigid hadn’t even snuck a plant in here like he had half expected her to.

Of _course_ Taako wanted his memories back, he wanted nothing more than that. But what if he didn’t have anything? What if when he remembered, he didn’t want to go back? What if he had nothing to go back to, or what if his past caught up with him?

Maybe behind the brick walls in his mind, good things weren’t waiting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol i actually like this chapter a lot, esp the last few paragraphs  
> lmk your thoughts


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He missed Taako- Gods, he missed Taako so much it was like a physical weight on his chest, holding down his lungs, he couldn’t breathe until Taako was back in his arms, but this was tiring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im declaring my ao3 habits as "regularly post for like two months, disappear for two, post one chapter randomly before dispersing again for a full 30 days and randomly posting two chapters". enjoy.

“I wish I was there with you-” Lucretia’s voice came through the stone distant and garbled, but clear. “This could be something to document, something that could help others. We are getting close to a cure, I know it, and this could help so many people-”

“Lucretia, are you on the stone again? Wait, is Magnus there? Gimmie-” There was a shuffling noise on the other line, and Merle’s muffled voice. “Hi Mags!”

“No, Merle, I wanted to ask some more questions-”

“Questions smuestions, as I always say!” Merle’s voice was cheerful, and from the sounds of it, it sounded like he was successfully taking the stone away from Lucretia, much to her despair.

“Merle, you have your own stone!”

“I lost it!” Merle shot back. There were footsteps, and Lucretia’s protests got quieter and quieter until they were gone. “Now that I’m finally alone, let’s see here. Who all am I talking to?”

Kravitz tore his eyes away from the stone to take a count. They were in the middle of what must have been main street- Angus had taken Lup and Barry with him to go interview people, specifically about this “flower fucker” that the man had mentioned Taako was with. Kravitz knew that he took the two with him just so that everyone else wouldn’t notice Lup pointedly ignoring Kravitz (and Kravitz pointedly ignoring mostly everyone), but he took them under the guise that “I can’t say bad words like that!”. Regardless, Kravitz was grateful. Only minutes after they had gone into the first store, Magnus’ stone started to hum. The second he answered, Magnus waved Kravitz over, and they found a nice bench to sit on while talking to those who had stayed back at home.

“Just Kravitz and I,” Magnus responded. Merle harrumphed, and it sounded like he was settling into a chair.

“How ya holding up, Bones?”

“I’m quite alright, Merle. How are you?”  Magnus rolled his eyes and poked Kravitz in the side, ignoring the side glare he got in retaliation.

“Barry called me last night- he told me what happened with Lup.” Kravitz sighed but didn’t say anything. “I’m going to talk Lup about it when I get the chance, but I’d like to hear your side of the story first.” There was a slight pause as both Magnus and Merle waited for Kravitz to say something. Apparently, the Grim Reaper took too long to say something because Merle charged right into it again. “Don’t make me get Davenport to come in here-”

Magnus gwaffed loudly. “Merle, you sound like our dad-”

“-I am not! Stop distracting me, you big oaf.”

“Seriously- you don’t need to talk to Lup. It is quite alright, we are both adults, we can work it out.”

“I think maybe an outsider’s perspective is needed on this one-” Magnus started at the same time that Merle spoke.

“No, no, it’s no trouble. Lup is stressed, and so are you, but the two of you shouldn’t turn on each other-” Merle took a deep breath, audible through stone. “Magnus! Shut the hell up!” Magnus snickered but stopped talking. “Kravitz. I’ll call Lup today, maybe even make her portal back home so she can sit down and breathe for a moment.”

Kravitz opened his mouth, ready to tell Merle how unnecessary that was when Angus (with Lup and Barry trailing close behind) came bursting out of the store, notebook gripped tightly in his hands.

“We found it! We found it!” Angus yelled, sprinting across the street (narrowly missing getting hit by a wagon) and jumping into Kravitz’s lap. Kravitz let out an _‘oof_ ’ when Angus landed, but the smile on the kid’s face was worth getting the wind knocked out of him.

“What did you find?”

“The flower shop- the man, he talked about a flower-” Angus hesitated, and stuck his chin out. “Flower _lover._ There aren’t any flower shops in the general area, and none of the ones in this town are run by women.”

“You got all of this information just from going into one store?” Magnus cut in. Angus stared at him, face forming what Taako would proudly call a _bitch, please_ face.

“I am the world’s greatest detective, Magnus.” This caused Magnus to snicker again, but Angus ignored him. “But the store said that a lot of the locals around here prefer to buy their flowers from a store in Arcton. Which is run by a _woman._ ”

Lup and Barry finally made their way over from the other side of the street, the immediate danger of being hit by a wagon having passed.

“That’s a start and all, but Arcton is thirty minutes away, how can we be sure that Taako is there? We only just got to Eastbourne, shouldn’t we look for leads here?” Magnus piped in again, resulting in a softer glare from Angus.

“I know what I am doing. Apparently, that flower shop delivered a few purchases to this area a few weeks ago- and it falls into the same date range that I believe Taako was here. We don’t have any leads in Eastbourne, but we do have one in Arcton- just, trust me on this.”

Kravitz softened. Merle, who apparently was still on the phone, cheered.

“Let’s go to Arcton, then.”

Angus hesitated again. “Well- actually- we should probably spend the rest of the day here. Magnus does have a point here, we just got here. Although we don’t have any more leads, maybe we can get more information about this flower place. The clerk in that shop gave me a list of other businesses that he knew of that frequently bought from the store.”

“What is the name of this flower shop, anyway?”

Before Angus could say anything, Lup spoke up, her eyes boring into Kravitz.

“The Soil ‘n’ Pot.”

Kravitz shifted uncomfortably, finally meeting Lup’s gaze. The second he did, she whirled forward, plucking Angus from his lap like he weighed nothing, and focused her look on the boy. “Okay, Ango. Where to now?” Angus seemed like he was caught off guard by the sudden movement, but found his rhythm quickly, flipping to a page in his notebook.

“A store called Herbet’s, it’s a market-”

Angus started walking down the path, chattering the whole time. Lup and Barry were right behind him, but Magnus held back with Kravitz.

“Bye Merle,” Magnus mumbled into the stone, and pressed a button on it, cutting off Merle’s protests. “Ready to go?” Magnus asked, turning to Kravitz. Kravitz sighed, running a hand over his face.

He missed Taako- _Gods,_ he missed Taako so much it was like a physical weight on his chest, holding down his lungs, he couldn’t breathe until Taako was back in his arms, but this was tiring. Running around with Angus, fighting with Lup, trying to navigate his place in this family and all without Taako. This was impossible- maybe actually finding Taako was possible, but being without his husband, functioning without him was the impossible task.

Kravitz was the Grim Reaper, he has been dead for centuries, he has lived longer without Taako than he has with him, but now the thought of not coming home to the elf, of never having another meal cooked by him, of never waking up to Taako having wrapped all of his limbs around Kravitz, ensuring that Kravitz couldn’t leave for work- that was devastating. A fate worse than death.

“Kravitz?” Magnus prodded at him, shaking Kravitz out of his thoughts. “You good?”

Kravitz exhaled sharply, and nodded. “Let’s go.”

At this point, the other three of their party was already down the street, Angus still clearly talking about which stores had ordered flowers from this store in Arcton.

As Magnus and Kravitz started to follow them, Magnus began to hum a tune under his breath. He was no bard, that was for sure, but Kravitz nodded his head to the beat, and tried to shove all other thoughts out of his mind other than ways to help find Taako. He honestly did feel useless-

But his feeling useless would not help them at all. No- he had to keep going, shove away everything else until everything was okay.

Four store interviews later, Kravitz was exhausted, and he knew he wasn’t the only one. Even Angus, who was the one who was all charged up about this at the beginning of the day was starting to drag his feet. Thankfully, Magnus noticed.

“We’ve made some progress here- why don’t we head over to Arcton? I’m sure we can find somewhere decent to stay there and go to the store tomorrow morning.” The man suggested. Kravitz nodded, rubbing his eyes. Angus was holding onto his hand, having shoved his notebook into his pack.

“I’ll just draw a rift there- do you know of a place we can stay?” Kravitz asked, but Magnus only shrugged.

“We can find some place. Or you could just rift us back home, and in the morning we could come back.” Kravitz held back a sigh- he knew that he wouldn’t be able to sleep and do nothing more than anxiously pace around his bedroom until morning. But looking at Angus, looking at _Magnus_ , he knew that everyone else needed a break. Badly.

Lup mumbled something about her taking Barry to their own place, they would just meet up in the morning before cutting a rift and hurrying her husband through. Magnus watched a bit disappointedly as they went.

“You guys will have to talk at some point, you know.”

“I know. It’ll just be easier when we have Taako back.” Kravitz could see Magnus gearing up to get into another speech, so he followed Lup’s lead and cut a rift. It led directly to Taako and Kravitz’s front porch. Angus happily (albeit, tiredly) hopped through and opened the door. Magnus looked like he wanted to say more, but Kravitz urged him through.

In the morning- Arcton. They were one step closer to finding him, they’ve made more progress in the past two days then they have in the past weeks. _Gods,_ wherever Taako is, Kravitz hoped that he knew that they were coming, Kravitz _prayed_ that Taako didn’t think that he had been abandoned.

But that was all that Kravitz could do now, as he settled back into the kitchen, automatically going to make more coffee. As he started to pull out the ingredients, he could hear Magnus quietly greeting Lucretia, Merle and Davenport, and the footsteps as Angus went up to his room. It was all Kravitz could do. _Pray._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> seriously, im awful at uploading but. like comments seriously encorage me. a few chapters ago someone left a comment that made me laugh really hard and so i decided to update. sooo. leave comments. 
> 
>  
> 
> [please listen to my playlist im so proud of it i swear it had good music validate me xoxo](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3jP3QVbeyZYgUq8S6alCA5?si=2IiUQLkJRIuOhqnvKSTjjA)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was just something about it, something so familiar, but there was no use in trying to figure out what it was, because like pretty much all things in his head right now, it was locked far, far away- or maybe just gone entirely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can u believe that we are almost at the end?

“Taako-” Brigid caught his attention from behind the register. “I need you to go run a delivery downtown. They are having some new ceremony or something- a new building is opening, I think. I don’t know, I don’t really pay attention to that shit-” Brigid ignored as a customer looked at her sharply at her language, instead focusing on Taako. “After that, you can take your break. Hang out downtown, maybe I’ll meet you for lunch. There is a good cafe down by the big fountain- you should check it out.”

Taako hummed from his position over by the bags of soil, currently taking (boring, boring) inventory. He nodded, making a final mark on the paper before standing up.

“Sure. Where is the order?”

“In the backroom. There’s a lot, you’ll need to take the wagon.”

Taako groaned loudly, and the both of them still ignored as the customer quickly collected her purchases and left. Taako draped himself on the counter.

“Brigid…. No…. I don’t want to take the wagon, it’s so heavy and it smells bad.” Taako whined, but Brigid only smiled and patted his shoulder.

“There are too many for you to carry all the way down town. Don’t worry- with how big this order is, we might actually be able to buy a new wagon, one that doesn’t smell bad.”

“Could we get one that we don’t have to drag along ourselves?”

Brigid grinned toothily. “No guarantees.  Now get going.”

Taako sighed once more, for the dramatics, and rolled off of the counter. He had done deliveries before, but this might have been the biggest one. Taako honestly hadn’t had the time to explore the town in much detail- not that Brigid was holding hostage, but he preferred staying in either the apartment or in the store. Less chance of losing his memory all over again and getting lost- but Brigid had a point. He really hadn’t gotten out at all, maybe this would be a good chance to really check out Arcton. Stifling another impending sigh, Taako began the tedious work of selecting the right amount of flowers, arranging them nicely and putting them on the wagon. Brigid would come in every ten minutes or so to make sure he was doing it right and not slacking off, but eventually, he was on his way.

Dragging the wagon behind him, trying hard to neither trip, or fuck up the carefully potted flowers, Taako began his walk to the town center. He was yet to know why exactly these flowers were so highly desired, or what event garnered them, but everyone else seemed to know what was up.

Things downtown were buzzing. It seemed like everyone in Arcton was outside, so there was a bit of traffic that Taako had to fight. The actual place of delivery was in dead center of town, so he still had a considerable distance to go.

Little kids were running in the streets, some carrying brightly colored balloons and others holding streamers.

Taako pulled the wagon down an alley, tossing a sheet of burlap over the flowers. Although he was still slightly fearful of magic after that whole mess, it sure would be helpful in moments like this, to make sure no one stole the flowers. It would be a pain in the ass to drag the flowers back uptown, not to mention Brigid being furious to know that he lost a whole order.

After making sure everything thing was as secure as it could possibly be, he walked back onto the street, heading over to a street peddler. Just like everything else, it was covered in bright streamers and some balloons were tied onto the poles.

“Howdy, Taako.” The peddler greeted Taako as he approached. “Want a meat cup?”

“As always Auz, that is the worst name possible for anything ever.” Taako shot back. Auz, a stout orc with tidy black hair and a salt and pepper beard, only chuckled.

“Well, when you come up with a better name for it, let me know.” Auz handed Taako a small cup made of crispy flatbread with a various assortment of meats, cheeses, and spices within. Taako winced as some of the steaming hot sauce leaked out and ran onto his hand.

“And maybe you should come up with a better way of serving it. Maybe something cleaner.”

“Says my best customer.” Auz remarked but handed Taako a napkin. Taako grumbled in response, but took it begrudgingly, trying to balance the cup in his hand while he wiped around it.

He had met Auz pretty soon after he arrived in Arcton. Brigid had sent him out on a delivery, but Taako got lost very quickly. Damn his cockiness and his resistance to asking for directions. He wandered around for what seemed like hours, carrying a pot of dumb sunflowers around. It was starting to get dark out, and Taako was beginning to think that even if he did know the way back to Brigid’s, he wouldn’t be able to make it. Just when things seemed bleak, Auz appeared.

“Want a meat cup?” Taako screamed, not having noticed a shadowy figure emerge from an alleyway. In the distance, light flicked on, some homeowner pissed off by random screaming at two in the morning. Sheesh. Get over yourself, random homeowner.

The figure seemed startled themselves by Taako’s reaction, and quickly moved underneath a street lantern so they were visible. He was holding a weirdly shaped item in his hands- it was food, Taako deducted, but it was a food that Taako had never seen before. The cup seemed to be made from some bread-like thing, or it at least looked like a corn chip that had been shaped into a bowl. But the inside might have been the strangest part. It was filled with various types of meat, cheeses, even tomatoes? Weird.

“Want a meat cup?” The orc asked again.

“Compadre. That is like the worst name for anything ever.” The orc only grinned toothily and held the cup out more. Taako took another look at the man, and gently sat the pot of flowers down. He then hesitantly took it from him but didn’t take a bite. Although Taako’s warning bells weren’t ringing now, that didn’t mean that the orc was a good person.

“It grabs customer’s attention, though.” The orc stuck out his other hand. “The name’s Auz.” Taako reached out and shook the orc- _Auz’s_ \- hand. “You seemed a little lost, there, partner.”

Taako raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore how juices from the meat cup were leaking onto his hand. “Partner?”

“Yeah. Friend. Like you said, compadre.”

“Sure. Yeah, well, thanks for the meat cup and the terrifying scare, but I think I need to get going.”

“What direction are you headed? I need to pack up shop anyway." Taako shrugged. "Come on, I swear I'm not some creeper- I got a wife and kids at home."

"As if that makes things any better."

"Good point. Fine. Just tell me which direction you are going in and I will point you down the right road." Taako squinted at him, the now-getting-soggy meat cup forgotten in his hands.

"Why?"

"Because you clearly are lost, and panicking. I like to think of myself as someone who isn't completely a dick, so why not help you? And I seriously was just about to pack up and head home."

"Fine. I need to get to the Soil 'n' Pot." Auz glanced down at the sunflower pot at Taako's feet.

"Ah, of course. You know Brigid?" Maybe Arcton was a smaller town than he thought- everyone seemed to know everyone around here.

"Yeah. I... Work with her." Wasn't a lie, wasn't the complete truth.

"Isn't it kind of late? She might be closed now." Once again, Taako raised his eyebrow.

"Isn't it kind of late for a meat cup seller to be out? Who is going to be buying meat cups from you at this hour?" Auz shrugged, unphased by Taako's line of questioning.

"You'd be surprised. Big market in teenagers, especially around this time of night."

"Well, Brigid is expecting me."

"Well, alrighty then. The Soil 'n' Pot is partially on the way to my place, so I'll walk you halfway. Are you going to eat that?" Taako looked at the cup. It did smell good and- fuck it.

Taako took a bite of it, eyes widening. The constant pounding in his head got louder and louder, but Taako didn't care because whatever this meat cup was- it was amazing. Even half cold it was good.

Auz grinned at Taako's reaction. "Told ya it was good." He swooped down and picked up the flowers.

Too bad they never got where they were going- although Taako half suspected that this was just a more drawn out form of Brigid's constant quizzing about the store. It was something that she would do, but this also meant that she would undoubtedly take pity on him when he got back and make something other than carrot stew (she had just harvested a large collection of carrots, so most of their meals have been carrot based).

"Follow me-" Auz said, carrying the pot in his hand like it was no big deal. "We need to go grab my cart, and then we can be off.

“You’re a street peddler? Who sells meat cups? To teenagers, in the middle of the night?” Taako asked, mouth full of ground beef. “How the fuck did you get your license?”

“It’s just that good, I guess.” Auz smiled at him again, showing all of his teeth- but instead of it being scary, it was a little dorky.

Mentally, Taako shrugged. _I guess I can trust him. If I die, I die, however shitty my death may be._

Flashforward to now, and the two were still friends- compadres, as Auz liked to say. When Taako mentioned Auz to Brigid, she simply smiled and said that Auz was a good man, if not a little quirky. Taako took another bite of the meat cup that he had, and reached into his pocket, pulling out a various assortment of coins that he had gotten from working with Brigid in the store. He didn't make much, since most of his money went to his share of the rent and food, but Brigid liked to sneak the occasional coin or two into his pouch when he was sleeping- he knew that she felt guilty, that she wasn't able to give him an actual salary. But businesses took a lot of money to take care of and keep open, and the sudden addition of the new mouth to feed was a surprise expense. When he could, Taako liked to save the money that he had, but Auz's meat cups were a luxury that he could definitely afford. It was worth it, because something about them tasted so damn familiar, so damn good.

"Thanks," Auz said, taking the money from Taako, and counting out the change. "You going to the statue reveal today?"

"Is that what all of the fuss is about?" Auz snorted.

"You are a little out of touch with Arcton's events, aren't you?"

"I would say more than a little. I think that I am delivering flowers to the event, which only proves how out of touch I am with this. But Brigid didn’t know anything about it either, so at least I’m not alone.” Auz laughed, forcing a smile out of Taako.

“Well, you’ve got your refreshments, so go and finish the delivery. Unless you need help getting there?” Their first meeting has become somewhat of a joke between the two. Taako has indeed gotten lost many more times after his first meeting with Auz, but he’s gotten better with practice and time. Now he handles most of the deliveries, which he knows helps Brigid out a lot.

“No thanks, I think I got it. See you later, Auz.” Taako said, nodding his head and going back to the cart. As he walked, he ate the meat cup. There was just something about it, something so familiar, but there was no use in trying to figure out what it was, because like pretty much all things in his head right now, it was locked far, far away- or maybe just gone entirely.

* * *

 

When he got to town center, he knew that he had made it. If the giant statue in the middle of it all, or the dozens of families walking around didn’t give him the clue that he was in the right place, the very stressed out organizers certainly would have informed him. Taako flagged down one of the workers, thankfully with one with a clipboard. He wanted nothing more than to just get this signed so he could enjoy his food and get back home. There was a new episode of Fantasy Bachelorette, and although he promised Brigid he wouldn't watch it without her, there were some promises that had to be broken for the greater good.

"You with Soil 'n' Pot?" The worker was panting, like they'd been running around. "You're twelve minutes late." Taako shrugged.

"Traffic was bad. You try hauling this across town when everyone and their grandma is outside." The worker glared but signed the paper that Taako presented him with. "You have people to unload this?" The worker nodded, spoke into his stone of farspeech.

Like out of nowhere multiple buff people appeared, all wearing matching uniforms. Taako smiled at them, but they all ignored him. Rude.

Pretty soon they all disappeared, and the flowers were gone. Taako's work here was done.

Finally being able to give his full attention to the meat cup, Taako looked at the statue, the one that was causing all of this hubbub.

It was made from bronze, and had seven faces in it, although those faces were blank, no disguisable features. They all were wearing robes, and some were holding wands, while one held an axe, and another held what looked like a flower.

Taako snorted, taking another bite of the meat cup. No one knew the faces of the seven birds- the Voidfish had left that part out. Taako had always thought it was a little depressing that the rest of the world didn’t know that it was _his family_ that saved the world’s sorry butts, but it was alright. He had been considering starting his show again, it would be nice to get back out on the road, be known as _Taako, from TV_ again, but Kravitz vetoed that idea for the time being, with his memory problems and-

_Kravitz._

The meat cup fell from Taako’s hands, narrowly missing his feet, but he didn’t notice, his mind racing. It was like someone had just unlocked the safe that had been torturing him for the past god knows how many weeks because he was suddenly remembering everything- Lup, Angus, wanting to go to Ren’s school, _Kravitz._

The fight with Kravitz, the night before he left. Fuck.

Taako took off, running towards the Soil ‘n’ Pot. He had to get to Brigid, she would have her stone of farspeech with her and he could call them, oh gods, he had to _go._

It wasn’t until he was minutes away from the store that he realized that he had left the wagon behind, but there was no way in hell that he was going to stop now.

Because Taako _remembers._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments are always so so appreciative. as you can see, the story is wrapping up, so there will only be a couple more chapters + a short epilogue. thank you all for reading as always!!


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I was just looking at it- I wanted to see who made it, but it slipped out of my hands.”
> 
> Brigid sighed. “I’m going to have to ask you to pay for that. Sorry- company policy.” At this, the boy perked up.
> 
> “Is the manager here?” He looked a little young to have the whole ‘can I speak to your manager’ routine, so she stifled the groan of exasperation.
> 
> “Yup. You’re speaking to her.” The boy looked even more excited, and Brigid seriously wasn’t following this conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS MY FAVORITE CHAPTER THAT IVE WRITTEN I REALLY HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE IT TOO I HAVE HAD THIS ONE WRITTEN BEFORE I EVEN WROTE CHAPTER FIVE EEEEEEEEE !!!!

Now, Brigid tried hard not to judge. It was not her place to assume about other’s lives. Sometimes owning the shop helped with that- she got to meet new people, see glimpses into their lives based upon what they needed. ‘ _I need a bouquet for a funeral’_ or _‘Do you sell pink and blue flowers?’_. It was lovely, sometimes. She has had her fair share of rowdy teenagers who come in and rough-house in the front room, but she usually just chases them off with a broom (teenagers tended to be like birds, or stray street dogs). What makes it all worth it was when a newly engaged couple came in, glowing with love and looking for flowers.

That was a nice sentiment- she should write that down and tell Taako about it when he got back.

There was a clatter, and a very loud and guilty sounding “Oops” which brought Brigid back to the present, reminding her what made her think of that in the first place.

A whole crowd of people came in, which was not necessarily an unusual thing, but the three who had entered were so radically different from each other, ruling out blood relatives. There was a young boy, no older than twelve, who was wearing extremely fancy clothes (making Brigid feel insecure in her gardening smock and dirt covered jeans) and toting around a small notebook. Every so often he would cast a calculating glance at Brigid and scribble something down. Trailing close behind him was a dark-skinned man, but he too was wearing rather fancy clothing, with a dark cloak around his shoulders that had a nice deep red inside to it. The man was keeping a close eye on the boy, but they didn’t look like they were related. Every so often the boy would mumble something to the man, or the man would squeeze the younger boy’s shoulder.

The third man who came in with them has been smiling the whole time, and only turns the brightness of his smile up even higher every time he makes eye contact with Brigid. He was clearly a strong man, but maybe not the most dexterous one, seeing how he was the one who said “oops”. Brigid took that as her cue, stepping out from behind the counter to go see what had happened. In one of the back corners where he had disappeared into, there he stood, with a now apologetic smile and a shattered pot at his feet.

The man winced as Brigid approached him, but before either of them could say anything a voice startled them both.

“Magnus, what did you do?” It was the man with the cloak and the little boy trailing behind him. The man- Magnus- winced.

“I was just looking at it- I wanted to see who made it, but it slipped out of my hands.”

Brigid sighed. “I’m going to have to ask you to pay for that. Sorry- company policy.” At this, the boy perked up.

“Is the manager here?” He looked a little young to have the whole ‘can I speak to your manager’ routine, so she stifled the groan of exasperation.

“Yup. You’re speaking to her.” The boy looked even more excited, and Brigid seriously wasn’t following this conversation.

“Mind if I ask you a few questions?”

“Are you guys reporters? For the ceremony?” Suddenly the notebook and questions made sense, although this was the youngest reporter Brigid had ever seen. Maybe he was an intern. She also felt extremely underdressed. They didn’t have any cameras on them, but she had just spent the morning knee deep in mud, her hair was falling out of her bun, she was a mess. If Taako was here, he could hold these guys off for a little bit while she cleaned up, made herself more presentable.

“Ceremony?” Magnus piped in, and Brigid was able to catch the stern looks the others sent him. “Uh- yeah! We are! But- uh- what’s the ceremony for, again?”

“The new statue?” Brigid started, more confused than ever before. “Of the seven birds? The saviors of the planes? Shouldn’t you guys know about this if you are reporting on it?”

There was an awkward silence as the three all looked at each other nervously, before Magnus laughed.

“Of course, yeah! That ceremony! We just wanted to make sure that _you_ knew about the ceremony.”

“I-“ Brigid cut herself off. That response made no sense at all. _Literally_ no sense. “Why don’t we go to the front of the store? I can get my employee to clean that up when he gets back.” She didn’t miss the look that the man with the cloak gave Magnus, or how the little boy was scribbling frantically in his notebook.

The four of them walked out to the main area of the storeroom just in time for another man to walk in. This one was wearing denim on denim, which Brigid just thought was a personal choice, but he looked dorky enough that he pulled it off well. Magnus lit up when he walked into the store- this must be another “reporter”. How many reporters are there?

“Barry!” Magnus boomed loudly.

“What newspaper are you guys from, anyway?”

“Newspaper?” The one that they called Barry stepped forward. “What newspaper?”

“Shut _up,_ Bluejeans.” Magnus hissed.

 “Aren’t you guys reporters?”

“Barry- where’s Lup?” The one with the cloak asked Barry. Brigid frowned- that name was familiar, but where did she know it from? "She stayed back in the inn to make sure that we got all of our rooms in order, but she's on her way." Barry turned to look at Brigid. "Is she filled in on our whole situation?"

The man in the cloak, Magnus, and the little boy all groaned in unison.

"We kinda had a story going here, Barry. Thanks." Brigid, feeling left out of a lot of important facts here, cleared her throat loudly.

"Hi. Excuse me. Yeah, what the fuck is going on? Are you guys reporters or not?" Magnus sighed, and shook his head. Brigid cut him off before he could speak. "Then why would you say that you are? Was it to get out of paying for that pot you dropped?"

Magnus cried "No!" at the same time that Barry said "Mags, what the fuck? You dropped a pot?"

The man in a cloak sighed loudly, dropping his head into his palm. The little boy looked equally as exasperated, but he stepped forward.

"We are looking for someone. We got a lead that you might have some idea of where he might have gone- do you mind answering a few questions?" Brigid nodded, even more confused. This did not go where she thought it would.

"Are you guys cops?"

That received a resounding “No!” from everyone, so, clearly not.

“Then what-“

The bell above the door rang again, and Brigid looked up, praying that it was Taako so someone could help her come sort out this mess.

“Taako-“ Brigid started, delighted as she saw the figure of her friend step through the door. But when she saw the red colored hair, and the clothes that Taako certainly did not own, she stopped herself. “Oh, sorry. I thought you were my friend-“ She noticed how the crowd of people around her had stopped arguing, and were all staring at her, eyes and mouths agape.

The elf strode towards her quickly, and it was then that Brigid saw that it was more than just their figures. Whoever this was looked _exactly fucking like Taako_ , like a mirror image. “I’m sorry, who are you?”

Instead of answering, the gorgeous elf asked, “Do you know Taako?” Brigid’s head hurt.

“Yeah? He works here, how do you know-“ It finally dawned on her where she recognized the name Lup. “Holy shit. Are you Lup?” The elf- potentially Lup- walked even closer to Brigid.

“Where. Is. My. Brother.”

“He just went out, we had a big delivery, I don’t know when he’ll be back but-“

The whole group, all five of them were surrounding Brigid at this point, most of them talking over each other, all looking various parts frantic, tired and in some cases (Lup) downright furious. She didn’t see where the man with the cloak went, both Lup and Magnus were a bit too much in her face. This went on for a few minutes, and Brigid could only just barely hear the bell above the door ring again. _Oh god, some poor perspective customer just walked into this mess-_

“Hey there, Bone Daddy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> like i said, my favorite chapter. 
> 
> one left, plus an epilogue. i hope you all are enjoying as this story wraps up. 
> 
> please let me know if you liked it!! comments!! kudos!! bookmarks!! share with your friends!!! message me on tumblr!! i literally have no friends who are into taz so !!!
> 
> anyway i seriously love every single person who has read this story and been kind enough to leave a comment. im being so serious, even if you comment one word, it makes a difference I NEED VALIDATION ESP BECAUSE THIS IS A BIG CHAPTER ok im done thank you, goodnigt


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Brigid looked like she was going to pass out.

It took less than a second for Taako to be completely swamped with various legs, and arms. Someone was crying- probably Magnus or Barry but also maybe Taako himself, not that he’d ever admit that.

There were tiny hands wrapping around his waist and- yup. That was Ango.

“Boychik, did they drag you on this too?” Before Angus got the chance to respond, someone hit Taako on the back of his head- _hard._ That would be Lup.

Lup yanked Taako out of the pile of his family and turned him so they were face to face. There were tears glistening her eyes, and _fuck it_ , he was crying too but now Lup was hugging him, he _remembers_ again, and god knows how long it has been since he’s seen her.

Distantly, he heard Magnus explaining something to Brigid, but frankly he couldn’t bring himself to give a damn in that moment. He took in a deep breath, inhaling the scent of his sister, relishing in the fact that he was here. With her.

Eventually, Lup stepped away, and Angus was on him in an instant, clambering up his legs. Taako obliged, picking the boy up, and holding him close, whispering little reassurances into his ear. Half of it was gibberish, the other half was in Elvish which meant that Angus wouldn’t understand but it didn’t matter because Kravitz was soon closing his arms around the two, pressing kisses to Taako’s forehead, cheeks, nose, anywhere he could reach.

“I’m sorry,” Taako whispered. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t go with you, I’m sorry it took me this long to find you.” Kravitz whispered right back, his hand on the back of Taako’s head, keeping them close.

“ _That’s_ Kravitz? Taako’s husband?” Brigid said from somewhere behind them, and Taako laughed wetly.

“I’m sorry it took me this long to remember. I took an unexpected detour on my little weekend trip, huh?” Angus pinched his neck gently, but it still made Taako laugh. He seemed to be in quite the emotional mood today. “Sorry, bubbeleh.”

Not wanting to leave Kravitz’s arms, he squirmed around until he was facing Brigid. Kravitz thankfully got the hint and loosened his grip enough to Taako could turn.

“Brigid, clearly, I remember everything now. Weird fucking timing though- I was down at the statue eating a-“ If Angus wasn’t gripping onto the elf tightly, he would have been dropped as Taako’s jaw dropped. “It’s a fucking _taco._ ”

Poor Brigid looked like she was going to pass out.

* * *

 

It took a while, but they eventually passed Taako around to everyone, so everyone got to hug or fret over Taako for an amount of time. Brigid herded everyone up into the apartment, where everyone settled down in the living room.

“Well, I feel like there are some things to discuss. First of all, I’m not one hundred percent sure I know who you all are, and I want to make it clear that I was not trying to kidnap Taako and keep him hostage-“

“Brigid, breathe.” Taako cut in. “This is Brigid, everyone. She basically found me when I was lost and alone, looking like a lost puppy and took me in. She let me stay with her and was trying to help me get my memory back.”

“Hi Brigid!” Magnus chirped.

“I guess we should start at the beginning?” Brigid clarified, looking at Taako for direction. Taako nodded, taking a moment to soak in the cool touch of Kravitz’s hand against his, and just the feeling of being himself again.

“Yup. So, you all are probably caught up on my shit memory system by now, but…”

* * *

 

Taako was sitting in between Kravitz’s legs, where Kravitz alternated in between running his hands through Taako’s hair and simply tracing his fingers along Taako’s back, feeling the bumps of his spine.

Because Taako was _here,_ in his arms. Taako was _here,_ chatting to Lup about flowers, or something like that. Taako was _here,_ and every few minutes he would lean back, grasping for Kravitz’s hand, just a reassuring squeeze.

Suddenly, Taako sat straight up. “Brigid. Holy fuck.” Brigid looked alarmed, startled out of her conversation with Magnus. “You are going to hate me for this.”

Brigid frowned. “I don’t think I could hate you-“

“I can cook. I am a world- no- fucking multi-plane renowned chef. I had a cooking show, cookbooks, everything.”

The room went dead silent as Brigid processed this information. This clearly meant something between the two of them, because Taako was trying not to laugh as Brigid rubbed at her forehead.

“You mean we went days eating only carrot stew only to find out that you can cook.”

“He can’t just _cook_ ,” Lup cut in. “He’s like the Mozart of food, especially dinner. I specialize more in breakfast or dessert.”

“You are right. I do hate you.” Brigid said, and she looked completely serious but Taako only laughed.

“I really thought I was dying that time that you made steak. I’ve never tasted anything so undercooked, but also burnt.” Taako chuckled.

“I’m so horrified. I can’t believe this. I was the only one who cooked- I was scared the whole time that if I let you in the kitchen you would burn the whole place down. The only way for you to make up for this betrayal is for you to cook us dinner tonight.”

Taako fell back dramatically onto Kravitz’s chest. “Oh, the burden of being talented. Fine. But nothing carrot related- I can gladly go the rest of my life without eating carrots.” Kravitz hummed happily, placing a kiss to Taako’s temple.

* * *

 

Lup had broken away from the group at some point, saying something about needed to go freshen up. But she had been gone for too long- and Taako had just gotten her back, they were just now falling back in sync, he knew when something was wrong.

Kravitz made a pained noise when Taako got up to look for her, but he pressed a chaste kiss to his husband’s head. The others pretended not to notice as he slipped out of the living room, but the bastards are a trillion different things before they come even close to being subtle.

Taako checked the bathroom first, but just as he suspected, the door was open, and no one was in there. An itch of panic sparked in the back of Taako’s mind, they had only just now found each other again but what if she was gone? Taako stepped back into the hallway, ready to race into the living room, he heard the floorboards creek further down the hall. The door to the room he had been sleeping in was ajar.

Taako stifled a sigh of relief and stepped into the room.

Lup was standing just inside, causing Taako to nearly run into her. She didn’t react other than placing her hand gently on the dresser.

“Is this where you slept?” Lup’s voice was quiet, but that wasn’t what was strange about it. Her voice, her posture, it all screamed tired.

They were all tired, that was evident. Everyone had so far avoiding telling Taako what had happened in the time that he was gone, but something was clearly up. Lup and Kravitz refused to look at each other, either Barry or Magnus standing in between the two at all times. Almost as soon as they had settled down in the living room Angus had fallen asleep leaning against Taako. “Is this your bedroom?” Lup repeated.

“Yeah.” Taako tried to take a step back and view the place he had been sleeping the past few weeks through Lup’s eyes.

It was… Empty. There was a succulent that Brigid had placed on the windowsill, but that was more due to her running out of room for plants in the living room than actual decoration.

There was a faded jacket hanging on the chair that Taako would typically never be caught dead in. “Lup-“ Taako started to say, but found that he had no words. Lup herself clearly had something to say, because she whirled around and jabbed her finger into his chest.

“Never. Ever. Do anything like that again. Istus and the Raven Queen are working on a cure, but until they get that don’t fucking pull any stunts like that again. I didn’t know if we would find you, but honestly? I didn’t even know if we would survive this whole ordeal. I fucking screamed my head off at your husband, so we aren’t talking, Angus has been so stressed and intent on finding you that he hasn’t been eating and we both know the little twerp needs his food. And to top it all off, Magnus has been anxiously making the shittiest ducks I have ever seen and,” Lup paused. “Fuck, Taako.”

Her rant seemed to have run out of steam. “We were all really scared.”

“I was scared too. I could tell, I knew the whole time that there was something that I was missing, something important that I was forgetting. Everything about me was just a big old blank slate. Honestly? I had given up hope on ever remembering, and on ever being found.”

The twins stood there, facing each other. They weren’t as identical as they used to be (fuck Wonderland) but Taako still knew his sister’s face better than he knew his own. How could he have ever forgot?

Lup seemed to have the same sentiment, because she reached out and brushed a lock of his hair behind his ear. Their hair was almost the same length, just like when they were kids.

“Why did you cut your hair?” Taako winced. It wasn’t his fondest memory, so he had left it out when Brigid and him were explaining the events of the past weeks.

“Why don’t we go back into the living ro-“ There was a flash coming from the living room, it’s light brightening the hallway that the twins stood in. Lup’s face brightened up, and she raced down the hallway. Taako, still a little behind on what was happening, followed.

“Get the plants away from Merle!” Lup crowed. As Taako stepped into the room after her, he was greeted by Davenport, Lucretia, and Merle. Merle gruffly gave him a pat on the back, and Davenport shook his hand, welcoming him back, but he saw the faint shine of tears in their eyes.

Lucretia hung back as Merle and Davenport greeted the others and met Brigid but Taako couldn’t resist any longer and pulled her into a hug. “Missed you, Luce.” He mumbled into her hair. Lucretia hesitated only for a moment before reaching around him and hugging back.

Soon enough, Taako was settled back in between Kravitz’s legs, where his arms almost instantly wrapped around Taako’s torso. Angus had woken up at this point and climbed into Taako’s lap before resting his head on Taako’s chest and falling asleep again.

Taako let out a deep breath. For once, there wasn’t any pounding in his head, and everything looked clear. Everything looked bright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you, from the bottom of my heart for reading this. seriously, every comment meant the world to me, every person who kept coming back to read more even after i vanished for weeks all have a permanent place in my heart. this story means a lot to me, and i can't believe that i got to share it with the world.  
> as always, you can always keep in contact with me. my tumblr is dear-galileo, and i will continue to update the playlist because that shit slaps.
> 
> next, there will be an epilogue, and then that's it. thank you so much for reading.   
> <3


	14. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Taako,” Istus smiled warmly at the elf who stood in front of her. “You’ve had quite the journey.”
> 
> “That’s just the life of Taako.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a short little thing, but the end of an era for taako, and the beginning of a new one.

“Taako,” Istus smiled warmly at the elf who stood in front of her. “You’ve had quite the journey.”

“That’s just the life of Taako.”

“That seems to be the case.” The Raven Queen agreed. The coffee table that sat in between them only had one tea cup on it.

“This is meant to be a quick visit- we have a gift to give you, then you can be on your way.”

It was strange, being in the Raven Queen’s throne room without Kravitz, or Lup, but the goddesses had requested privacy. _“We will keep your beloved safe, Kravitz,”_ Istus had said to Krav when he hesitated to leave Taako’s side. It had only been less than two weeks that they’ve been together again, and since then Taako had always been surrounded by at least one person, usually Angus or Kravitz.

Lup and Kravitz finally made up after Taako made them sit down together and talk out their feelings. Huh. Who would have thought that Taako would be the one to make people talk about their feelings?

“A welcome home gift? Thank you, you really shouldn’t have.” Taako was only playing coy- he knew why he was here. Lup had briefly mentioned a cure that the two were working on, but the goddesses were a bit stingy when it came to giving anyone updates. Merle, Dav and Lucretia, who were also supposedly working on a cure were slightly bitter when they found out that they had been beat, but to be fair the gods had more than a little bit of divine power on their side.

“Something like that. Come closer, child.” Taako obliged, walking close enough that one of the women could reach out and touch him if wanted- and that is exactly what Istus did.

She placed a delicate hand on Taako’s forehead, and he found himself closing his eyes on instinct. Istus was murmuring words under her breath, and the scent of herbs were nearly overpowering, Taako was feeling faint.

He didn’t know how long it was until Istus took her hand away, but when she did, all the lights around him seemed to grow brighter, brighter and brighter until his eyes were starting to strain- and then it was done. Taako blinked hesitantly a few times.

“Is that it?” The Raven Queen laughed.

“Weeks of our work for ‘is that it’?” She took a sip of her tea. “But yes. That is it. Your mind has been freed from the torturous impact that the Voidfish left on it.”

“Huh.” Taako found himself to be a bit dumbfounded. He had only one very minor episode since he had gotten back, he had a nightmare and woke up scared, but that was it. The Raven Queen snapped with her fingers, and Kravitz suddenly appeared by his side. “Oh, hey sweet bones. Guess I’m cured now.”

Kravitz, ignoring the goddesses who were watching with amusement, grabbed Taako and swept him into a deep kiss, nearly cradling his body. Taako merely laughed and went with it. “Come on Krav. We said we’d meet Brigid in Neverwinter before it gets too late?”

As him and Kravitz straightened themselves out again, Taako glanced at the goddesses. “Thank you. It was pretty rad of you to do that.” The Raven Queen laughed again.

“You are welcome. Kravitz, my child, take care. Give Lup and Barry my best wishes.”

Kravitz, ever the drama queen, bowed lowly, giving thanks and that whole tirade, but Taako got bored and started to tug him out of the room. “Duces, ladies!”

As his husband tore them a portal to their home, Taako placed a kiss on his cheek. Memories were a tricky thing- but maybe they wouldn’t be so hard now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wish i could just live in this world and keep writing about it for forever. i love you all so, so much.   
> <3  
> em

**Author's Note:**

> comments inspire me to write even more!! seriously you could just be like "yo you wrote this part decently" and i would cry and name my first born after u xoxo  
> tumblr is deargalileo


End file.
